Bold Beauty - July 16

“…a woman came to (Jesus) with an alabaster jar of very costly ointment,

and she poured it on his head as he sat at the table.” (Matthew 26:7)

Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 37:1-18; PM Psalm 37:19-42; Joshua 3:14-4:7; Rom. 12:1-8; Matt. 26:1-16 

What comes to mind when you hear the word “beauty?” How would you describe beauty?

I see an example of beauty in a broken shell. It reminds me of combing the beach with my daughter, Kat, when she was a little girl, and my mother. When Kat collected her bucket full of broken pieces of shells, Mama and I glanced at each other in confusion because we have only picked up (mostly) whole shells. Kat exclaims that they’re ALL beautiful, even the broken ones, and she shows us the colors, patterns, and textures she sees, even in their brokenness. There’s beauty in brokenness, beauty in this memory of loving and binding relationship, and beauty in God’s creation. Beauty is all around us.

Beauty comes in all shapes and sizes in every part of life. It can engage any of the five senses and be experienced through the full range of emotions. Beauty is shared and experienced through the mind, body, and soul, and it has a way of cracking our hearts open. When our hearts are open, Beauty ennobles us to think, to take action, and is often beyond words. I have come to recognize Beauty as sacred and transcendent. This morning’s gospel passage captures bold beauty.

Just outside the scene, there’s surging energy with people gathering from far and wide for the Passover festival at the Temple. Riots are not unusual during the time of the festival and emotions are raging more intensely from within the palace of the high priest as they conspire to arrest and crucify Jesus. Jesus knows he will soon be put to death and this woman who is not named and does not speak apparently knows also. As a woman, she takes a risk and approaches him boldly with her extravagant offering of ointment. While oil and water would have been acceptable, the woman chooses very costly ointment and she uses it lavishly by pouring it generously on his head. Though she doesn’t speak, she doesn’t need to in order to participate in his suffering and mission of love and service to others. I sense that her heart is broken. She is moved to give this gesture used for burial and fully present to this intimate and important moment with Jesus, amidst all the distractions beyond them. Her actions and presence speak for her. And Jesus receives her offering, even defends her offering by lifting her as an example of self-sacrificing love and service that they must continue after his death and resurrection. This is bold beauty.

Now… Consider 2020 which is not unlike the scene in Bethany Village outside Jerusalem with heightened emotions and tensions.  We’re suffering the loss of human contact and the death of our dreams for graduations, birthday celebrations, weddings, vacations, concerts, and so many other hopes we’ve envisioned, not to mention devastating death tolls being caused from the social, environmental, economic, and physical ills of our communities and nation. And we’re reimagining life looking ahead.

It’s part of the human condition to experience suffering, loss, and death, and these experiences make us vulnerable and break our hearts. But through the cracks, our suffering opens our hearts to Beauty. Beauty is a reflection of God and Beauty heals. We all could use some bold Beauty in our lives right now!

-- Susan Oakes, Seminarian

Susan Oakes is a rising senior at the Seminary of the Southwest in Austin, Texas. This summer, she is serving as a seminarian intern at Saint Stephen's, her sponsoring parish for ordination.

Questions for Self Reflection: How do you define beauty?

Daily Challenge: Look for beauty today. Describe it in detail and notice how it makes you feel and how it reflects the nature of God to you.

Bridges of Connection - July 15

Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 38; PM Psalm 119:25-48; Joshua 3:1-13; Rom. 11:25-36; Matt. 25:31-46

An icebreaker I use frequently with events is a game called “this or that” where I’ll draw a line down the middle of the room and present a variety of pairs, and the participants choose a side based on their preference for either “this or that.” Here’s a couple examples, snacks that are salty or sweet? Read a book or go to a party? The goal is to mix and mingle and have fun. The stakes are low. But what about the choice between Auburn or Alabama? Still pretty low stakes, but emotions emerge around your side being the right and best side. I’d never ask the following question because it’s too risky…Republican or Democrat? I mean, can we even be friends if we’re not on the same side? I say that with a fair amount of sarcasm, but we all know that politics often create a harsh line that can damage relationships – sometimes beyond repair. With or without politics, the year 2020 has given us plenty of choices that separate us between “this or that” side – drawing sides between who’s right, who’s wrong? Who’s in, who’s out?

I’m hearing a similar theme of who belongs and who doesn’t across all the readings from today. In Joshua, we hear that God is driving out the Non-Israelites as the Israelites cross the Jordan carrying the Ark of the Covenant. In Matthew, we hear Jesus describe the judgment of nations and the separation of the good from the bad. In Romans, we hear “a hardening has come upon part of Israel” (11:25) that divides some from the others based on acceptance of Jesus. There is a distressing sense of chosenness and rejection, and it seems to be based on God’s judgment. But if we take a closer look, there’s hope! The Psalmist encourages us, “Behold, I long for your commandments; in your righteousness preserve my life” (Ps. 119:40). Righteousness is being in right relationship with God through the commandments and God offers us a timeless and life-giving bridge of connection through living in covenantal relationship.

From Joshua, the Ark of the Covenant represents the presence of God with the Israelites because it contains The Law – which is the bridge that keeps us in right relationship with God and our neighbor.  In Matthew, Jesus tells us that by serving others we serve Jesus himself. And Paul writes that God’s mercy is for all people of all time and places, and God calls each of us to participate in this mission of salvation for the whole world. These are bridges of covenant with God. There are other bridges that connect us, also, such as communion and prayer. Each invites confession and reconciliation to restore broken bridges; this can sometimes be the most difficult and yet fruitful kind of bridge. Each also invites intercession, praise, and thanksgiving for the abundant and universal gifts of mercy, love, and grace that keep us connected.

I don’t know about you, but I’m longing for connection rather than separation. God invites us into relationship and life in Christ. Contact a loved one to check in. Better yet, consider someone who challenges you from “that side” and ask God to soften your heart towards them. Find a way to connect with nature. There are many options to explore and I encourage you to build a bridge of connection in some way this week.

-- Susan Oakes, Seminarian

Susan Oakes is a rising senior at the Seminary of the Southwest in Austin, Texas. This summer, she is serving as a seminarian intern at Saint Stephen's, her sponsoring parish for ordination. 

Question: In what ways do you feel separated? connected?

Daily Challenge: Many bridges exist. What bridge are you approaching…does it need repair in any way? Does it involve others in any way? Does it offer a way to connection for someone else? Take steps towards building a bridge this week.

Who is that Broad? - July 14

Today’s Readings:AM Psalm 26, 28; PM Psalm 36, 39; Joshua 2:15-24; Rom. 11:13-24; Matt. 25:14-30

I was excited to see what I drew for this week’s readings and the story of Rahab appeared from the book of Joshua. I’m not going to pass up a chance to highlight a prostitute as an unlikely Biblical hero and I’m very curious about what Rahab is up to. I’m reflecting on the whole chapter 2 of Joshua for today’s reflection, which includes yesterday’s passage along with today’s for the complete story of Rahab. So who is this Rahab broad? There are very few women who are named in the Old Testament, but here we have Rahab, a non-Israelite (she’s a Canaanite) and a prostitute. These descriptors introduce us to Rahab, but what makes her important enough to be named?

Joshua is preparing to conquer Jericho as part of his mission to bring the Israelites to the Promised Land of Canaan. In doing so, he sends two spies to scope out Jericho and the first verse says that they go to the house of the prostitute named Rahab and spend the night there. Not much is left to the imagination here. While I don’t think their sexual escapades are the point, I do wonder why they choose Rahab, the prostitute.

Prostitutes in this Hebrew context are neither protected by nor under the authority of a husband, living on the outskirts of town and most active under the darkness of night. Prostitution thrives with an imbalance of power, resulting in prostitutes being desired, yet shunned. So Rahab is someone who is living on the margins of society, both physically and socially, with unconventional freedom. As such, Rahab has a unique and complex allure.

Now, I wonder why Rahab takes such a high risk to protect and assist the Israelite spies. She cleverly outsmarts the king of Jericho, sending the king’s men on a wild goose chase in search of the spies. Perhaps she is tired of being the town prostitute and living at the bottom of society - or tired of being identified as someone who lacks wisdom or morals. Perhaps she feels she has nothing to lose.  The text does not tell us what we might be assuming about her motivations.

What the text does tell us is that this misfit Canaanite is faithful to God. The Canaanites have heard about the miraculous crossing of the Red Sea and their hearts are “melting” with fear and knowledge of the Lord’s presence with them, proclaiming, “The Lord your God is indeed God in heaven above and on earth below” (2:11). In this moment she is claiming her faith.

Another interesting part of her identity is Rahab’s name, which translates to mean “broad” in Hebrew. That’s befitting for a prostitute as a slur. But she is so much more than a prostitute; she is wise and faithful. Rahab broadens the boundaries between the insiders and outsiders of the covenant by facilitating the destruction of the line that divides the Israelites and the Canaanites. She aides their mission and makes an oath with the spies who are able to safely return to Joshua with the news that the Lord has given the Promised Land to the Israelites. Her decisive action to assist the spies through her faith in God makes her vital to the success of Israel’s inheritance of the promise God made to their ancestors.

This female, outcast, “broad” of Jericho discerns God’s will through wisdom and chooses to follow God’s mission through her faith. Rahab not only knows who she is, but more importantly, she knows WHOSE she is. She belongs to God and is faithful to God. That is her true identity and purpose!

-- Susan Oakes, Seminarian

Susan Oakes is a rising senior at the Seminary of the Southwest in Austin, Texas. This summer, she is serving as a seminarian intern at Saint Stephen's, her sponsoring parish for ordination.

Questions for Self Reflection

• When have you been surprised by someone else’s faith?

• When have you risked for faith?

Daily Challenge

Identify someone or a group who is marginalized and investigate something new you might learn from them.

Practicing Love and Light - July 13

Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 25; PM Psalm 9, 15; Joshua 2:1-14; Rom. 11:1-12; Matt. 25:1-13

It’s summertime, 1984, and I’m all set to go to college in the fall. My parents have said I’ve been a pretty easy kid to raise and I have plenty of friends. I’ve made good grades, been active in church, and mostly stayed out of trouble my whole life through high school. I’m not perfect, but I’ve had a pretty easy time growing up thus far. As the time for moving to college gets closer, people frequently ask if I am ready, to which I reply with a hearty YES! This is the “before times” and my lamp is filled with oil. What I am not ready for, is how to keep my lamp filled. As I begin college, I’m pretty certain I have my life under control. I’m not mad at God, I just feel like I’m fine on my own. My selfish behaviors during the next few years determine that I am foolish. Thankfully, this isn’t my last chance to fill my lamp.

The gospel passage from this morning is a continuing conversation between the disciples and Jesus about the “end times”, aka, the second coming of Christ in the age to come. Jesus knows he will soon die and be resurrected, the temple will be destructed, and there will be much loss and suffering. He has been presenting himself to the disciples as a sign of the Kingdom of Heaven present both now and in the end times. He’s teaching them how to prepare by saying - watch me now and do as I do, and you will know the Kingdom of Heaven. He’s showing them how they will keep their lamps filled with oil. Jesus tells the disciples to “keep awake!”, for we do not know when the time will come. The point here is not that we have to know when, but to be ready.

Jesus has spent his whole ministry teaching his followers how to be ready. Most simply stated, being ready is the ongoing practice of decentering ourselves by loving God and loving our neighbors with our whole heart. Being generous with love is how the wise maidens keep the oil replenished in their lamps. Someone else cannot share our love for us – as the foolish maidens request – we each have to share our own Love and Light, and that’s often easier said than done. By loving others, especially those who are hardest for us to love, we are embodying the love of Christ in this world and hastening the Kingdom of Heaven.

Are we ready for the end times? That’s a super scary question! During the Eucharistic prayers, we proclaim the mystery of faith, saying “Christ has died, Christ is risen, Christ will come again!” The early church was expecting the return of Christ to be imminent, but we are still waiting for the time when Christ will come again. This is part of our Christian hope, a glorious time when God will be all in all. We are striving for this even now.

Being either a wise or foolish maiden is too dualistic for me. I’m both on any given day. We don’t know when the time will come, but if we’re accepting the teachings of Jesus, we know what to do. Though we mess up along the way, it’s ultimately HOW we live out our lives through faith in Christ that prepares us.

-- Susan Oakes, Seminarian

Susan Oakes is a rising senior at the Seminary of the Southwest in Austin, Texas. This summer, she is serving as a seminarian intern at Saint Stephen's, her sponsoring parish for ordination.

Questions for Self Reflection

• What if Jesus was talking to you today, preparing you for the Kingdom of Heaven…in what ways are you being wise and foolish?

Daily Challenge

Think about a favorite scripture passage that describes what it means to be Christ-like and connect how you embody that text through your life.

Did you see Jesus in the Gorilla costume?

Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 20, 21:1-7(8-14); PM Psalm 110:1-5(6-7), 116, 117Deut. 34:1-12; Rom. 10:14-21; Matt. 24:32-51

Have you participated in the experiment where you are asked to count in a video the number of times the people wearing white shirts pass a basketball?  It is a famous psychological test called the “Selective Attention Test.”   The premise is there are six people and three are wearing white shirts.  Two basketballs are introduced, and the people weave in and out of a circle passing the balls.  You are supposed to count how many times the people wearing white shirts pass the ball. Most people get the correct answer, which in the video I saw was fifteen times in the forty-five seconds or so.

But that is not what the test is really measuring.  In the middle of the video, a person in a large gorilla costume walks right across the screen.  Weird, right?  Here is what is even weirder: only thirty percent of people notice the gorilla.  Seven out of ten people completely miss a person in a large gorilla suit walking directly across a screen with basketballs being thrown around the gorilla!  And those people are paying attention!

This puts an interesting twist, on Today’s Gospel when Jesus tells the disciples to “Keep awake for they do not know when the Lord is coming.”  The Gospel of Matthew uses the image of a thief coming in the middle of the night. The disciples are supposed to be vigilant.  What if they are waiting for the Lord and a giant gorilla walks right by and they miss all the fun.  I’m being facetious, but think it’s worthy of consideration, that we sometimes might be so focused that we miss the real beauty of waiting.   What if the disciples were vigilant, but they were focused on the wrong stuff? 

As Episcopalian or Anglican thought has it, we often live very much in both/and world.  We wait for the Kingdom to come, and yet we proclaim that it has also arrived. We wait for Jesus, and yet we know that Jesus is present.  I wonder sometimes if we miss some of the beauty of God’s world coming to live in our midst.  Stories of hope, love, reconciliation, resurrection, joy, peace, and grace because we are bogged down looking for something else.  What would you see if you weren’t trying so hard to count the number of times a basketball is passed or something else hyper-focused?  Would you see Jesus walk by in a Gorilla suit or something even more extraordinary?  

-       John+

Questions for Self-Reflection

• Are there specific things that you seem to focus on in life?  Maybe to count, or observe, or pay attention to?

Daily Challenge

If you are out today going to a store or walking in your neighborhood, and the place if familiar, try to find five things that you have never noticed before.

The Creepy Jesus Vibe - July 10

Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 16, 17; PM Psalm 22; Deut. 31:7-13,24-32:4; Rom 10:1-13; Matt. 24:15-31

When I was a youth minister, someone gave me this cartoon that hung out on one of my bulletin boards for several years.  It said, “I like that Jesus guy, but his followers sure give me the creeps.”  What is it about followers of Jesus?  We are all just that, and yet, let’s be real, we don’t want to give off too much of the creepy Jesus vibe. 

Now Jesus is not only my life but my profession.  I don’t just try to follow Jesus, but it is my calling to lead others to his radical way of love.  And yet, I am writing about the creepy Jesus vibe, and my hunch is you all know what I am talking about.  It’s that phrase in Paul’s letter to the Romans: “I can testify that they have a zeal for God, but it is not enlightened.”  Ouch, Paul!  They love God, but they don’t know what they are doing?  Paul continues, “For, being ignorant of the righteousness that comes from God, and seeking to establish their own, they have not submitted to God’s righteousness.” In my own language, they care more about loving God than living into God’s radical way of love.

I am wondering if part of what that creepy Jesus vibe is living into that nasty temptation to love God more than to love what God is inviting us into: a way of living with God through love.  And I wonder if that is what Paul is pointing us to in his Epistle to the Roman people. I saw a story recently of people sharing images of Christians yelling hateful things at other people.  In many places in the world, I suspect this is how we are perceived to be, people obsessed with telling others how they are doing it all wrong instead of people who live a way of service, love, humility, empathy, and compassion.  And I am wondering if all of that stems from glorifying Jesus above glorifying what God is inviting us into: that is the radical way of love. We become more obsessed with our love of Jesus then the life that flows from his love.

I love the point Paul makes towards the end of this passage – “For there is no distinction between Jew and Greek; the same Lord is Lord of all and is generous to all who call on him.” I think we get it right when we see all people as children of God, and when we lose the judgment and move to love.  Maybe it’s how we can be followers of Jesus and drop the creepy vibe part too.

 -       John+

 Questions for Self-Reflections

• Are there parts of the Christian faith that bother you? 

• What about as your identity as a Christian?

Daily Challenge

Today, pay attention and notice when you are judging others.  We likely all do it, but paying attention and naming it may be the key to learning to suspend judgment.

Nothing will remain… but something new will rise – July 9

As Jesus came out of the temple and was going away, his disciples came to point out to him the buildings of the temple. Then he asked them, ‘You see all these, do you not? Truly I tell you, not one stone will be left here upon another; all will be thrown down.’ – Matthew 24:1-2

Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 18:1-20; PM Psalm 18:21-50; Deut. 3:18-28; Rom. 9:19-33; Matt. 24:1-14

In our Gospel today, Jesus is standing outside of Jerusalem on the Mount of Olives just east of the Old City on a ridge that looks over the land.  From that point, he can see all of Jerusalem, and he turns to his disciples and asks them to look at the mighty Jerusalem with the towering Jewish Temple in the Old City and he warns them that nothing that they see will remain. 

I was standing there almost three months ago today with a group from Saint Stephen’s and we were reflecting on this very passage.  Little did we know that when we got on the plane, we would return to a world that would be drastically different than the world we left behind.  We have often focused solely on this passage as a reference to Jesus’ body or the 2nd Temple.  He is crucified just after this and by 70 A.D., the Temple is destroyed. 

But Jesus could also be pointing us to the lack of permanence in all of human life. Everything we know is susceptible to loss.  Our churches will look drastically different as we work through this virus.  Many businesses will change and some will not return.  It’s odd, but I think the greatest threat to progress will be our long-lasting nostalgia that has us clamoring for the good old days.  

One of the most important lectures that still deeply impacts me was listening to Dr. Walter Brueggemann claim that nostalgia leads to violence.  When we misremember the past and hold on to it, we deny the possibility that God is doing something new.  The Israelites were lost without the 2nd Temple but with it came the emergence of Rabbinical Judaism.  For us Christians, we see the temple of God being raised in Jesus Christ, the Resurrection, the dwelling of the Holy Spirit when we gather together, when we love each other, when we live out our faith.  This means something new is taking place.  In our lives and our culture, it’s possible that we will learn a better way of being.  Maybe you are walking more in your neighborhood, or talking to friends, growing in your own self-reflection and who you are called to be, or realizing that your parents are actually enjoyable to talk to as adults. 

God is always doing something new in our midst. We just have to be open to see that work.  May we learn not to fear what will be lost so that we can appreciate what will be gained.  Nothing will remain, but something new will rise.

-       John+

 Questions for Self-Reflection

• In the last three months what things that you love, have you lost?  What new things have you learned or gained?  

Daily Challenge

• Honoring the Maria Kondo approach, take one thing you need to get rid of in your life.  Imagine that thing, give thanks for the joy it brought you, and throw it away!   It doesn’t have to be a physical thing.

It's a Pattern - July 8

Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 119:1-24; PM Psalm 12, 13, 14; Deut. 1:1-18; Rom. 9:1-18; Matt. 23:27-39

The other day, after much negotiation, pleading and begging, I was able to convince my children to abandon the grip of Netflix binge-watching from some good old-fashioned arts and crafts.  “We don’t have any crafts Dad!”

 “Just do something creative!” I begged as the hours of television had reached a critical point.

“Fine,” announced Bailey, and off they went on the hunt for arts and crafts supplies which we undoubtedly have plenty of in our household. 

Bailey came back about twenty minutes later with a plastic square with pegs where she had carefully filled it with little plastic beads.  This craft allows you later to take a piece of wax paper and an iron and you can melt the plastic together. “Dad, dad! Look at this!” 

“What is it sweetie?” 

“You don’t know,” she replied. 

“No, I confirmed again.” 

“It’s a pattern!” To be fair, I should have known the answer.  My kids are obsessed with patterns. 

I think some people are wired to see patterns in just about everything we do.  If Bailey had spent a lot of time in Psalms 12, 13, and 14, our selections for this evening (noon if you are participating in our noonday prayers), she would have probably commented on the patterns.  Each Psalm begins with concern, “Help me Lord, for there is no godly one left; the faithful have vanished from among us” (Psalm 12:1) or “How long, O Lord? will you forget me for ever? How long will you hide your face from me?” (Psalm 13:1).  Even Psalm 14, the author claims that “Every one has proved faithless; all alike have turned bad; there is none who does good; no, not one” (Psalm 14:3).  The Israelites sure were consistent with voicing their concern that the world was broken and people were pretty good at screwing up life.  Additionally,  they were concerned with what was assumed as a lack of God’s agency in the midst of their struggles: “How long shall I have perplexity in my mind, and grief in my heart, day after day?” 

Good News – In all three of our Psalms, the story turns around.  It’s a pattern.  “’I will rise up,’ says the Lord, ‘and give them the help they long for’” (Psalm 12:6).  “I will sing to the Lord, for he has dealt with me richly; I will praise the Name of the Lord Most High” (Psalm 13:6).  “Oh, that Israel’s deliverance would come out of Zion!” (Psalm 14:7). 

 As I read the Psalms, I find myself with many of the same questions as the author.  I feel like our world is filled with corruption and people who have proved faithless.  I want to say, “Have they no knowledge, all those evildoers who eat up my people like bread and do not call upon the Lord?”   It’s moderately reassuring to know this is nothing new.  It’s a pattern.  Good thing the story has a beautiful ending. 

-       John+ 

Questions for Self-Reflection

• Where do you see patterns in your own life?

• How do these patterns impact your prayer life?

 Daily Challenge

Remember a time when things were especially tough in your life.  Try to recall how your faith was helpful and use that a source of hope in your prayer life.

How do we find unity when we disagree? - July 7

Today’s Readings:AM Psalm 5, 6; PM Psalm 10, 11; Num. 35:1-3,9-15,30-34; Rom. 8:31-39; Matt. 23:13-26

Perusing today’s lessons, I am finding lots of good possibilities for exploration.   We have a powerful bridge between the secular and religious worlds in Numbers where the Israelites are instructed to set up towns and are then commanded with God’s laws on how to be fair and just to all including the transient alien among them.  There is a commandment not to defile the earth, and how the spilling of blood pollutes what God dwells in.  If I really wanted to exegete this passage (and I am not going to go there) I am sure that where I end up will upset plenty of readers and not go far enough for others. And the irony of this is the New Testament passage paired with this reading is all about unity.  When these two passages are read in dialogue, we get to have a pretty interesting conversation (and I am going to go there).

In Paul’s epistle to the Roman’s (v. 8:38-39), Paul offers one of the most beautiful passages in all of Scripture: “For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.”  I have preached using this passage probably more than any other line in all of Scripture.   But I often jump here skipping what Paul has offered just prior to these verses. Paul suggests that the separation from God that we are considering is not one image, or person, or one divisive belief, but hardship, distress, persecution, famine, nakedness (not sure quite what that means), peril, or sword. The challenges we face in life, not explicitly each other, causes us to feel separated from God.

As much as I want to blame other humans for the divisiveness that we experience, a better approach might be to consider the root of the stress that plagues our society.  We blame humans, but Covid-19, violence, inequality, sin, racism, are not only often at the root of the divisiveness but much larger than any one individual.  Yes, individuals play an enormous role in perpetuating the divisiveness and are sometimes the cause of aggravating or activating the root cause, but seeing the root as much larger than the individual may allow us to enter back into conversation with our sisters and brothers with whom we disagree. 

How do we find unity when we disagree so vehemently with each other?  One suggestion could be to see unity not as a common mind, but a commitment to not let the underlying issues that cause our divisions to fracture the sacred commitment to be in relationship with each other.  How is that possible? Answer:  Jesus Christ and the Love of God.  That’s Paul’s answer, and its good enough for me too.    

 — John+

Questions for Self-Reflection

• How have your relationships with people changed in the last few months? 

• Where have relationships been enriched and where have they been strained?

Daily Challenge

• Think of a person with whom you seem to disagree on about everything.  Name three concerns that you likely share. 

How are we going to get out of this mess - July 6

Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 1, 2, 3; PM Psalm 4, 7; Num. 32:1-6,16-27; Rom. 8:26-30; Matt. 23:1-12

“Dear God, what should I pray for today?” 

July has arrived which means we have made it to the second half of the year 2020.  For our football fans who are reading, we are at the start of the third quarter, and it feels like we are down 97-3.  But America loves a come-from-behind story and I am hoping for one.  Maybe something like the Reggie Miller 8 point swing in about 9 seconds against the New York Knicks in 1995 or one a little more familiar here in Alabama, when Cam Newton and the Auburn Tigers were down 24-0 in the Iron Bowl.  I keep wondering how in the world are we going to get out of this mess we collectively know as the year 2020.  I am hoping for a comeback of even greater this fall.   Not only am I hoping sports return, but worldwide peace, justice, hope for those who have struggled to find hope, reconciliation, a booming economy, and political unity with a vanquishing of Covid-19 (and all other emerging threats).   Which brings me to today’s question, “How and what do I pray for when life is so crazy?  When people are so divided?  When I myself don’t know what is best? How are we going to get out of this mess?”

Which leads me to ponder, what if we aren’t supposed to know how to get out of this mess?  I am struck with our readings from Paul’s letter to the Roman’s where Paul encourages the community that is also struggling to pray. “Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we ought, but that very Spirit intercedes with sighs too deep for words.  And God, who searches the heart, knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God.”  I wonder if what Paul is suggesting that is not a prayer which proposes a certain outcome, but instead an openness to God. 

I have struggled over the years with Romans (v. 8:28) where Paul says that “We know that all things work together for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose.” I don’t want to suggest that some of the cruelty, or pain, or violence is God’s will, but it is comforting to think that potentially God is making something beautiful and new out of it.  Maybe to believe this is to let go of outcomes such as preserving or reforming that which needs attention, and instead being open to the movement of God in the midst of our common life. That openness can lead to preserving what God’s need preserved and reforming what God needs to be reformed, but we can be freed from our attachment to what we believe is best. 

I’m hoping the 2nd half of this year is an incredible underdog story that rivals all others.  Why shouldn’t it be?  Our God led the Israelites out of their bondage in Egypt through 40 years of the wilderness into new life and promise.  Our God raised Jesus Christ from the dead.  And from the lives of 12 disciples and a few of their friends, the greatest story in the world has spread, a story of love and hope, and new life to all ends of the earth.   If that isn’t an underdog story, then I don’t know what is. I’m ready to see what this chapter has in store.

-       John+  

Questions for Self-Reflection

• What have you been praying for lately?  Could you let go of those outcomes in your prayer life?

Daily Challenge

• Try 15 minutes of centering prayer with no petitions or intercessions.  Here is a quick guide[1]

• Sit comfortably with your eyes closed, relax, and quiet yourself. Be in love and faith to God.

• Choose a sacred word that best supports your sincere intention to be in the Lord's presence and open to His divine action within you.

• Let that word be gently present as your symbol of your sincere intention to be in the Lord's presence and open to His divine action within you.

• Whenever you become aware of anything (thoughts, feelings, perceptions, images, associations, etc.), simply return to your sacred word, your anchor.

[1] Pennington, Fr. M. Basil. "Centering prayer: Refining the Rules". Review for Religious. 45 (3): 386–393.

Jesus schools the smarty-pants crowd – July 4

Today’s Readings:  AM Psalm 137:1-6(7-9), 144; PM Psalm 104; Num. 24:12-25; Rom. 8:18-25; Matt. 22:23-40

In this reading from the gospel according to Matthew today, the Sadducees publicly propose a test of heavenly logic, framed in an earthly context: Who will a woman be married to in heaven if she has been married seven times – once to each of seven brothers - because her husbands keep dying? The argument is couched in the law delivered by Moses: “If a man dies childless, his brother shall marry the widow…” The Sadducees are not concerned about the “black widow” quality of this woman who apparently runs through husbands like toilet paper. They want to know, when the apocalypse comes, to whom will she be hitched.

Jesus shuts them down swiftly. “You are wrong, because you know neither the scriptures nor the power of God.” Jesus goes to the heart of the prolonged attempts to trick him. His retort begins with a direct strike: You are wrong. Period.

And then, he supports his declaration of the Sadducees’ flawed essence with a two-point foundation: you don’t know the written Word of God – Torah. The law passed down through the generations of our people. The 600+ commandments. The divine revelation of the Lord God through the prophets. And secondly, you don’t understand the spiritual power of God. You cannot conceive of the overarching nature of what God is. You have not been stirred in your heart by the hope and promise extended to God’s people.

Jesus names that what is awry here in this group of people within the Jewish faith is a deficiency in both head and heart. There is a disconnect…a chasm. Because there is a chasm in our world between what occupies our earthly existence, and that which lies beyond the veil of what we see and understand – that divine gift of the broad expanse of God’s realm. The Sadducees trip themselves up with superimposing an earthly construct (human customs of marriage and social infrastructure) upon the divine paradigm that we humans keep trying to put into a box.

Do you ever do this? Put God in a box, stuck in your head? I do. When we do this, we miss the point of God’s love, God’s grace, and the holy joy that is available to us in the invitation to so much more than we can conceive in our own heads. We also miss feeling the glory of that love which passes all understanding. So, let us love the Lord our God with all our heart, and with all our soul, and with all our mind. Heart first. Let’s receive the invitation to feel God’s gift of love.

-- Katherine+

Questions for Reflection

• What questions do you pose to God?

• What questions does God offer to you?

Daily Challenge

What vexes you about God? Journal about what frustrations you have...and invite God's love for you into that space.

Lord, guard the door of my lips – July 3

Today’s Readings:  AM Psalm 140, 142; PM Psalm 141, 143:1-11(12); Num. 24:1-13; Rom. 8:12-17; Matt. 22:15-22

I scroll through social media posts, looking for something different…anything…and then: Ooh! A delicious recipe. Ugh…a disheartening post. Bwa-ha-ha…a hilarious video. I come away with some new (and unhealthy) way to present chicken and cream cheese to my family, a bur under my saddle regarding someone else’s opinion, and maybe a giggle to share. I am amused, but I am not comforted. Momentary distractions are not enough to resolve this wholly uncomfortable time.

When I was six or seven, I went to Eufaula with my friend Caroline and her dad for a weekend at their lake house, complete with fishing, hiking, a bonfire and roasted marshmallows – topped with lots of laughter. On the way home, Mr. Crook treated us to pizza. There was probably “co-cola” (translation: Coca-Cola) involved in our lunch feast, too – because that’s what good fathers give children! We had a rollicking good time and got back on the road to Montgomery. At some point on the journey, I started to feel nauseated. I curled up in the footwell of the backseat to take a nap.

As I slept, the wooziness tapered off and I felt better. Upon waking, another wave of nausea returned. I closed my eyes again. I did not let Caroline’s dad know the extent of my discomfort. Pulling into their neighborhood, he said, “We’re almost there!”, but it was too late. While napping had helped temporarily, my motion sickness was not comforted. I vomited all over the backseat of the relatively new Cadillac. It was awful…on many levels. (Years later, I learned that they had to sell the car, as no amount of cleaning was able to remove the odor.)

I hang on these words today: “Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips. Do not turn my heart to any evil, to busy myself with wicked deeds in company with those who work iniquity…” (Ps. 141:3-4a). Those words of prayer couldn’t help the situation between my mouth and the Cadillac on our journey from Eufaula…that was a lost cause from the Pizza Hut. But, as for living into a faith journey with God in 2020, there is some wisdom in this ancient plea. Before idly scrolling for fleeting comforts, imagine what would happen if we incorporated these three actions as part of our individual spiritual disciplines:

·       Ask God to give us strength to turn back from our own sinful impulses of self-righteousness and pride.

·       Pray for the Lord to provide a sense of centeredness and focus, comfort and direction.

·       Ensure that what we put in our mouths, minds, and hearts is rooted in the source of goodness: God.

With God’s help, the words and deeds flowing from each of us would then be grounded in God’s truth and love. Shall we try?

-- Katherine+

Questions for Reflection

• What person (or issue) is bothering you today?

• What would praying for that person (or issue) look like?

Daily Challenge

Take the words of Psalm 141 to heart today: do not busy yourself with getting swept into the hurtfulness of others. Through meditation, journaling, or some other method, turn to God in prayer for courage to examine your own hurts.

Things that go bump in the night – July 2

Today’s Readings:  AM Psalm 131, 132, [133]; PM Psalm 134, 135; Num. 23:11-26; Rom. 8:1-11; Matt. 22:1-14

As the oldest child, I would often be sent on errands upstairs to gather something that was needed while my mom was cooking dinner. Inevitably, it would be around twilight and prior to my parents turning on lights. We lived in this old, turn-of-the-century two-story house with 15-foot ceilings and creaky floors. The wooden floors upstairs had not been refinished, and the hallway had no windows. The house was spooky sometimes. Imagining a ghost or rambling spirit was easy within those walls. I remember that sense of looming peril as I went into my parents’ shadowy bedroom. Upon grabbing the fingernail clippers or other sundry request, I would blindly dash with all my might down the dark hallway, trying desperately to reach some beacon of light and safety. I can still feel my heart racing wildly and that lurching sensation in my stomach. I can see my nine-year-old fingers extended, grasping for the cool railing of the metal spiral staircase, as light from the kitchen filtered upward. “I made it,” I would think, with a sigh of relief.

It may be no surprise, then, that the images of being thrown into the outer darkness, surrounded by shrieking cries and grinding teeth, laid out for us by Jesus in today’s reading from Matthew set me on edge. I think I am still afraid of the dark. So, join me as we take a deep breath, fumble for a light switch, and look around at where we are in this passage for a moment.

Jesus is in the temple and teaching folks who have gathered. The chief priests and other people in authority come to question him: “Who authorized your actions and what messages are you perpetuating here?” Jesus responds with three parables that we’ve heard this week. Each condemns the sitting Jewish religious leaders, by shining light on the darkness that enshrouds them: the hypocrisy of saying “Yes, Lord,” and not following through (Matthew 21:28-32); the greed of hoarding the treasures of God’s vineyard without gratitude or generosity (21:33-41); and, the arrogance of sitting at the bountiful feast within the kingdom of heaven without the posture of humility and righteousness (22:1-14). Jesus is shining the light of God upon the darkness that lingers over aspects of the religious institution at that time. He names the darkness to open their eyes to God’s truth, so that they may repent.

The Messiah comes to us, too, telling us stories of how we have strayed…so that we might see the light of overflowing grace beckoning us to a place of hope and warmth, delivering us from the “ghoulies, ghosties, and long leggity beasties, and things that go bump in the night”. As we cower or dash about in this time of darkness and fear, we may not think to grab for the light switch, but know that Jesus is alongside you, guiding you to spaces of hope.

-- Katherine+

Questions for Reflection

• What were your childhood fears?

• How are your fears now different?

Daily Challenge 

• Name one thing that frightens you today. Think of an image that defines it. Pray that God will shine a light upon that fear and open your eyes to a new way to respond to that situation.

The Yellow Wildflowers of Texas – July 1

Today’s Readings:  AM Psalm 119:145-176; PM Psalm 128, 129, 130; Num. 22:41-23:12; Rom. 7:13-25; Matt. 21:33-46

When we lived in Austin, Texas, we would go to this great nursery and organic gardening center called The Natural Gardener. It was a little piece of sprawling Hill Country nestled in the exponential growth of an urban mecca. The Natural Gardener's gardens had wildflowers, a babbling brook landscaped with colorful flora, a huge swing, and a petting zoo with fancy chickens, fickle goats and an elusive donkey. There were days in the white-hot summer we would drive the 30+ minutes out to this haven, just for a place to go -- for a change in the rhythm of the week. I found great refreshment wandering the winding paths through herb arrays, edible farming rows, and dusty avenues to small corners of shade. It felt like time slowed down as I ambled and explored.

During one visit in the springtime, we found the Natural Gardener’s labyrinth, aglow with yellow wildflowers growing along the curves and turns. The rocky dust of the ground welcomed feet of all sizes, and the circuitous pathways invited play and prayer. As I read the words of Psalm 119 today, I am reminded of the meditative quality of praying psalms – especially this one. The selection of the words is woven tightly, always revolving around the center: YHWH (Yahweh). God. This portion of Psalm 119 is so raw. The psalmist pleads: I call out to you, God. Life has been hard. I try to keep your laws and statutes. Bring me redemption. It’s a prayer for God’s order in the midst of messy life.

And so, this morning I imagine rehearsing this song of prayer while walking (or tracing) the pattern of a labyrinth. The waves of emotion parallel the turns and switchbacks of the maze of meditation. What a cleansing and centering experience that can be, to allow these ancient prayers to draw us nearer to God. Breathing, praying, being. Being self. Being with God. Being loved.

-- Katherine+

Questions for Reflection

• Where is a place of refreshment and connection for you?

• In your mind’s eye, who else joins you there - friend, family, pet, or Jesus?

Daily Challenge

Spend a few minutes tracing the journey of a labyrinth (click here). When exploring a labyrinth, the pathway in is as challenging as the pathway out. How will you carry your sense of refreshment from God’s grace outward to others today?

Talking donkey?? Sure, why not! - June 30

Today’s Readings:  AM Psalm [120], 121, 122, 123; PM Psalm 124, 125, 126, [127]
Num. 22:21-38; Rom. 7:1-12; Matt. 21:23-32

This week in our Daily Office lectionary, we have an Old Testament narrative of the story of Balaam, a traveling professional seer from Syria. God uses Balaam over the next three chapters to protect the Israelites from curse and attack by Balak, king of Moab. Balaam is not an Israelite or exclusive follower of the Lord God, and yet, due to his spiritual connection with God, Balaam is obedient. And today, we get a story with a flare of whimsy and surprise: a talking donkey.

In a year of many unexpected changes, writing a reflection on Holy Scripture encompassing the tale of a talking donkey was nowhere on my radar. And yet, here we are. Balaam saddles his donkey to start the journey to King Balak, who has appealed again for a curse to be levied against the Israelites. We see God giving mixed messages: assent to the “psychic friend” to go, then anger that he begins his travel. And then, unbeknownst to Balaam, an angel of the Lord stands - invisible to the human eye - in the middle of the road to block his passage. But the donkey sees, and keeps careening off the path to avoid the sword-wielding angel. Balaam hits and chastises the donkey for its nutty behavior. After the third time, God opens the lips of the donkey: “What have I done to you, that you have struck me these three times?”

What?? God opened the lips of the donkey? I am trying to think back during my Christian formation…did I ever learn this story as a kid? I guess this one was overlooked in assembling the curriculum, but it is the only other time in the Bible when God allows a sub-human species to communicate in spoken word across the boundary of humans and animals. (The other was when the serpent spoke to Eve in Genesis.) Perhaps this story was omitted because in most accounts, humans and non-humans are clearly delineated and divided, speaking according to their nature. It is more orderly like that, right?

But this unique fable, in the midst of the book of Numbers, spun and tailored across hundreds of generations, pushes us into a space of discomfort in the unexpected. The lowly donkey is the one who sees God’s angel of aggression and peril. The lowly donkey, though beaten, is faithful to and protective of its owner. The lowly donkey is raised up, becoming the teacher and seer, the voice of wisdom and truth.

Whether that is how it happened or not, this is a piece of the yarn that is woven into our story as people of God. There is more to explore in this fascinating scripture, but for now, let’s just sit with the talking donkey, and marvel at the transformation God can complete in each of us.

-- Katherine+

Questions for Reflection

·       Who tells you the truth?

·       How do you respond when someone you rely on reacts differently than you expect?

Daily Challenge

• After the talking donkey incident, Balaam says, “The word God puts in my mouth, that is what I must say.” Pray that God will put words in your mouth today.

God, help me walk in Jesus’ footsteps – June 29

Today’s Readings:  AM Psalm 106:1-18; PM Psalm 106:19-48; Num. 22:1-21; Rom. 6:12-23; Matt. 21:12-22

The Presiding Bishop, the Most Rev. Michael Curry, held a ZOOM conference call with the clergy of the diocese on Friday morning, leading up to the consecration of Glenda Curry as Bishop Coadjutor for the Diocese of Alabama this past weekend. He reflected on Jesus’ words from John 15:5, 9 – “I am the vine, you are the branches. Those who abide in me and I in them bear much fruit, because apart from me you can do nothing…As the Father has loved me, so I have loved you; abide in my love.” He lingered upon the word “abide” and explored the imagery of branches attached to the vine of Jesus.

Bp. Michael Curry has noticed a pattern in his walk as a Christian. Inevitably, during the times he has listened to himself more than the influence of Jesus, he stumbled. When he has followed the steps of Jesus over and above his own desires, he’s felt on the right path -- closer to God, a branch upon the vine of Jesus. Then he said, “When we have walked in Jesus’ footsteps…saints – flawed sinners though they may be – have popped up.” He named saints like Francis of Assisi, Martin Luther King, Fannie Lou Hamer, Desmond Tutu, and Pope Francis, among others.

This message – abiding in Jesus’ love as the vine, so that our branches may bear beautiful fruit – resonates in tandem with our reading from Romans 6. When I try desperately to have all of life under my control – especially when so much feels like it’s spinning wildly – I stumble. To make it worse, the tension of managing the many moving parts of life builds up in my shoulders and neck – and can overflow into staggering headaches. As John preached yesterday on this very same passage from Romans, I scribbled this paraphrase: sin can be defined as thinking we have it all under control. When we sin, we make missteps. We stumble. It is that sin which weighs us down. What a burden this creates, dominating our mortal bodies.

In thinking we have everything under control, we are not acknowledging the overarching role of God in our lives. The role of love. The role of salvation. The role of sanctification: setting us apart to serve God’s purposes in the world. We become branches detached from the vine, and we miss the wisdom and grace that comes from walking in Jesus’ footsteps. And yet, when our eyes are open to the truth that God is in control, “sin will have no dominion over [us], since [we] are not under law but under grace” (v.14). In that shift, our hands are surrendered for God’s use, and with deep intention our hearts are committed to God.

Today, grab the hand of Jesus. Go to God in prayer. Ask for the Holy Spirit to inspire and guide your steps today, so that you may abide in the love of Jesus. That’s what I am going to try to do, with God’s help.

-- Katherine+

Questions for Reflection

·       Think about a time you have sinned, or stumbled. What were the factors?

·       Ponder how you might walk more closely in Jesus’ footsteps.

Daily Challenge

• Pray the Lord’s Prayer, imagining you are holding Jesus’ hand. Reflect on how the imagery of closeness can reconnect you to the vine of God’s love.

Kumbaya - June 27

Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 107:33-43, 108:1-6(7-13); PM Psalm 33; Num. 20:14-29; Rom. 6:1-11; Matt. 21:1-11

Psalm 33 makes me happy and brings me comfort! It is absolutely a psalm/song of praise of God’s sovereignty, goodness, and divine generosity, which is the core reality of our world. I remember the Rev. Denson Franklin would often refer to poetry in his preaching and would say that poetry is best when read aloud. Well, the psalms are a form of poetry and I’m glad we get to read them aloud together for the Daily Office. This one evokes so much joy, it needs to be enjoyed collectively. And it seems fitting to be filled with joy today which is the day of the Rev. Glenda Curry’s ordination and consecration as the new Bishop Coadjutor for the Episcopal Diocese of Alabama. Thanks be to God!

Right from the beginning of Psalm 33, a vivid picture is painted that portrays a glorious and festive celebration of those who love God with rejoicing, music and voices lifted high, and God’s participation by spreading loving-kindness all around. It’s a picture-perfect image of peace and harmony, it’s like they’re singing Kumbaya on steroids! Kumbaya means “come by here” and I need to hear something uplifting and comforting like this today.

A few days ago, I was complaining that it feels like the same things continue to dominate my thoughts and I am riding an emotional roller coaster. The situation with COVID-19 seems to be getting worse and more cases are hitting close to home. I’m tired of physical distancing and miss face-to-face connection through friends, family, and worship. There are people who are not working, who are underemployed, and some who have lost their jobs due to riots. This job situation is maddening. I support the good cops who are serving for our safety and protection, yet I have also been disturbed by the police brutality. Of course, I believe all lives matter, and I understand the movement for Black Lives Matter, and I support peaceful protests, but it’s exhausting to be focusing so much effort toward listening, learning, and discerning how to be part of the solution. All of this compounds the issues that already existed among the sick, vulnerable, and marginalized before everything went to Hell in March 2020. Things are messy and complicated right now. I think it’s still going to take some time for us to get to a new place of stability and well-being, but I do have hope and believe we’ll get there, with God’s help.

The last verse of Psalm 33 is one that serves as a Kumbaya type mantra: Let your loving-kindness, O Lord, be upon us, as we have put our trust in you (Ps. 33:22). God’s loving-kindness can heal us and heal the world, if we put our trust in God. Let us pray for our minds to be quieted and our hearts to be opened so that we may receive God’s love and healing for ourselves and the world.

 -- Susan Oakes, Seminarian

Susan Oakes is a rising senior at the Seminary of the Southwest in Austin, Texas. This summer, she is serving as a seminarian intern at Saint Stephen's, her sponsoring parish for ordination.

Questions for Self-Reflection:

• How are you holding up lately?

• How are you coping?

• What encouragement for others can you offer?

Daily Challenge:

Commit Ps. 33:22 to memory and call upon it when you feel overwhelmed, distressed, uncertain, or afraid.

Jesus, I See You - June 26

Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 102; PM Psalm 107:1-32; Num. 20:1-13; Rom. 5:12-21; Matt. 20:29-34

We each hold different images of Jesus. He is portrayed as a shepherd, teacher, healer, son, friend, redeemer, and more. There’s one image I’ve been blind to, and that is the image of liberator. I must admit that I initially resisted the image of liberator because it feels emotionally charged and makes me feel defensive. Yet, this expanded imagery is an important part of my formation that has surprised me with new insights about my relationships with God and neighbor. I had the privilege of developing this new vision even more when I went on pilgrimage to the Holy Land for two weeks right after Christmas. We were able to keep up with the news of the emerging coronavirus, yet the focus of the pilgrimage never shifted from the purpose of Jesus’ life on earth and walking the path of some of the most important moments of his ministry, including his death and resurrection.

One of the last few mornings we were there, another pilgrim and I took advantage of our free time to go back to the Church of the Holy Sepulchre. This is where the site of the Crucifixion, the Resurrection, the stone of anointing, the empty tomb, and the paschal fire are located. We spent time reflecting on our journey and praying together. The most profound moment was witnessing the prayers as people flowed through these spaces, especially the stone of anointing. I could sense their faith and trust in the power and mercy of Jesus as people would kneel down to kiss the stone and pray. I joined in praying and I can still remember the feeling of kneeling among other faithful people, smelling the fragrance of myrrh oil from the stone, and hearing the multitude of prayers and foot shuffles of the people surrounding me.

This experience of pilgrimage and prayer took me beyond reading about Jesus to seeing, walking, hearing, smelling, and feeling the places I’ve studied and opening my heart and mind to a richer understanding of his purpose. The sense of knowing things in my mind shifted to a special knowing in my heart and soul also. Jesus liberates us from our sinfulness and oppression through forgiveness, healing, teaching, and directing our lives.  I have discovered that I am oppressed, myself, by my sins, and I depend upon Jesus for liberation. Matthew’s passage about Jesus healing the sight of the two along the way from Jericho reminds me of my own sight being healed and the power of prayer. The good news I have for you is that you do not have to travel across the globe to encounter Jesus because he is ready to meet you along your journey wherever you are and eager to be in dialogue about what you need to be healed and made whole.

-- Susan Oakes, Seminarian

Susan Oakes is a rising senior at the Seminary of the Southwest in Austin, Texas. This summer, she is serving as a seminarian intern at Saint Stephen's, her sponsoring parish for ordination.

Questions for Self-Reflection:

• What image comes to mind when you think of Jesus?

• What image do you resist, and why?

Daily Challenge:

• Consider your prayer life and what you to ask of Jesus to do for you through faith.

Guided by God's Love - June 25

Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 105:1-22; PM Psalm 105:23-45; Num. 17:1-11; Rom. 5:1-11; Matt. 20:17-28

“…God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit…” (Romans 5:5)

I can’t read this passage from Romans without recalling the time that I ran a marathon. It’s hard to run a marathon, it’s not natural for a body to run that far, and it hurts…a LOT. It’s also like having a part time job because it’s very time consuming. It’s not like you just show up on race day and start running. NO! When someone decides to run a marathon, they spend months training for it. This involves running almost daily, as well as meal plans and extra time for physical therapy and naps. The runner also learns as the training gets harder to dig deeper into their soul for the drive to not quit this difficult thing. Then on race day, the runner gets in the right mind space to be able to push through the pain, with the goal to finish the race. And the race is not actually a race for speed, it’s a goal to finish. At the finish line, every runner wins the satisfaction of accomplishing something big that requires much suffering, endurance, character, and hope.

I think this marathon imagery is a good metaphor for the signs of our times right now. Striving to overcome the challenges of COVID-19, racial unrest, and economics requires the long, difficult, and painful commitment to get us to the finish line. I’m not sure if we even know where the finish line is located, but I think the concept still works. What this marathon imagery does NOT include is the crucial element of God’s love being poured into our hearts through the power of the Holy Spirit (Romans 5:5).

As Christians, we are guided by God’s love for us to reach the finish line of this hard race. Many of us are feeling a sharp sense of urgency for a better world and that’s the finish line we are racing toward. We have suffered such tremendous losses that there is now a creative tension between what has been the status quo and what is now possible. Guided by God’s love being poured into our hearts, we are striving for a world that reflects the good news of our forgiveness and restoration in Jesus Christ. God’s love is powerful, and this gives me hope that we will cross that finish line, though it is not quite in sight.

 -- Susan Oakes, Seminarian

Susan Oakes is a rising senior at the Seminary of the Southwest in Austin, Texas. This summer, she is serving as a seminarian intern at Saint Stephen's, her sponsoring parish for ordination.

Questions for Self-Reflection:

• What sense of urgency do you feel for your world right now?

• What will it take to cross the finish line? 

Daily Challenge:

Watch for God’s love being present and guiding yourself or others. Gives thanks for this in your prayers.

Let Our Hearts Be Softened - June 24

Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 101, 109:1-4(5-19)20-30; PM Psalm 119:121-144; Num. 16:36-50; Rom. 4:13-25; Matt. 20:1-16

“Am I not allowed to do what I choose with what belongs to me? Or are you envious because I am generous?” (Matthew 20:15)

Today’s gospel passage is tricky, and being completely honest, I can easily get irritated with the workers who are hired last and receive the same wages as the first shift. And, of course, I always imagine myself among the workers who are first, the ones who are working the longest hours, bearing the burden in the scorching heat. Not fair. This parable fits right in line with the other parables Jesus has been telling about the kingdom of heaven and what it takes to receive eternal life. But I’m just not seeing the good news in this one…yet.

Because of my own irritation with this passage, I needed to do some digging to uncover the good news of this parable. That recurring phrase about the first being last and the last being first is hard and I was investigating that part. But what actually captured my attention is the word “envious” and it turns out this is an important word. Being envious has to do with how the world is seen. The eye is described a few chapters earlier as a lamp of the body. Is our eye healthy or unhealthy? If our eye is healthy, our whole body is full of light; to the contrary, an unhealthy eye fills the body with darkness. In this passage, the question Jesus asks, “are you envious because I am generous?” is the same as asking, “is your eye evil?” This gets my attention. Am I seeing God’s love and goodness, and reflecting the light of Christ in my life? Or am I envious and seeing through the eyes of judgment, fear, jealousy, and darkness? For me, as much as I hate to admit it, it’s both. Sometimes my sight is healthy and others it’s not.

This is not just any old vineyard Jesus portrays…this is God’s vineyard! This parable is about God’s love, justice, and mercy. God rewards those who are in the vineyard because these are God’s people and God loves them and wants to draw everyone to the vineyard. It doesn’t matter when, what matters is that everyone arrives. I think my irritation is rooted in my understanding of our capitalist economic system which is based on competition. BUT with God’s free gift economy there is no competition because there’s enough of God’s love, justice, and mercy to go around for as many people who seek God’s kingdom. In fact, in God’s vineyard – the kingdom of heaven – the more the merrier!

Someone offered prayers for our hearts to be softened during the Daily Office yesterday, and I think that gets to the heart of what the kingdom of heaven is about. The world needs us to release our envy and soften our hearts for each other right now. Softening our hearts allows us to reflect the light and love of Jesus. As we work for God’s kingdom, let us be glad that we are God’s people and welcome others to join in the work to receive the same love, justice, and mercy that we’ve already received.

-- Susan Oakes, Seminarian

Susan Oakes is a rising senior at the Seminary of the Southwest in Austin, Texas. This summer, she is serving as a seminarian intern at Saint Stephen's, her sponsoring parish for ordination.

Questions for Self-Reflection:

• Have you ever invited someone into kingdom work or questioned someone else’s work?

Daily Challenge:

• In real life, it’s easy to hold the posture of envy and judgment. Think of a time that you have held this posture and pray about it, asking God to soften your heart.