Lord, Save Me!

Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 40, 54; PM Psalm 51; Eccles. 5:1-7; Gal. 3:15-22; Matt. 14:22-36

Oh, you of little faith…who among us this day cannot relate to Peter? Last week was a horrible week for our nation, this week isn’t shaping up to be any better, and things might still get worse before they get better. Things have been changing so fast, it’s hard to keep up or know what to do.

We are experiencing human tragedy on so many levels right now. People are dying, suffering, isolated, protesting, rioting, pleading for life, unemployed, having their means destroyed, grieving and lamenting. We must also remember that the suffering from isolation, illness, vulnerability, and marginalization was happening before our current situation began. On a brighter note, we are learning and making hard decisions about how to open things again safely for our overall well-being and SpaceX did send Bob and Doug into outer space (some have joked about the appeal in leaving planet Earth).  I’ve experienced the full range of emotions through all of this – anger, sadness, fear, and even joy.

If I’m not careful, though, it’s the doubt that can take over. Like Peter, with all the storms of the world around me, I get scared, confused, overwhelmed, and I lose hope. Our help is in Christ. Peter says, “Lord, save me!” Lord, save us all! It’s our faith that keeps us afloat.

A friend of mine from Austin posted a picture of herself recently wearing a t-shirt that says, “Energy, Intelligence, Imagination, Love - #WeAreTheChurch” and reminded me that we are Christ in the World. We must carry with us out into the world the faith in the way of Love that Jesus teaches. This way of Love is the way to healing, wholeness, truth, justice, peace, freedom, safety, and reconciliation that we’re all hoping and praying for right now. When we doubt who we are in Christ, we sink and drown. We have much work to do, but we cannot do it without Christ. Let us reach out to Jesus to save us and trust that we will be saved by our faith in Christ.

 — Susan Oakes

Susan Oakes is a rising senior at the Seminary of the Southwest in Austin, Texas. This summer, she is serving as a seminarian intern at Saint Stephen's, her sponsoring parish for ordination.  

Questions for Self Reflection

• What thoughts, feelings, emotions, emerge as you experience the historical events that are happening?

• How are you responding to events and others?

• When and where is Jesus reaching out to save you?

Daily Challenge

• As you watch the news or scroll through your social media feeds, use the lens of Love to filter through everything and try to discern where you see Christ most alive around you and within you.

You are my Disciples - June 4

Today’s Reflections: AM Psalm 50; PM Psalm [59, 60] or 8, 84; Eccles. 3:16-4:3; Gal. 3:1-14; Mat. 14:13-21

As my reflection for today, I’m taking a more light-hearted approach and retelling the gospel narrative in today’s context. As you listen, try to identify the place where you fit in.

Now when Jesus heard that the people were dying from disease, both physical and cultural plagues, and that many were suffering, protesting, angry and questioning over the ills of the world, He withdrew to spend some time in solitude. But the people wouldn’t leave Him alone with their thoughts and prayers. He could sense their distress during these troubled times and had compassion for them, saying, “Truly I tell you, if you click on this Zoom link, we can figure this whole thing out.”

So, all those who were sending thoughts and prayers gathered with Jesus via Zoom and immediately began pleading for him to handle things because there are too many people to feed. But Jesus took charge of the meeting and said, “hang on, hang on, hang on…you’re telling me there are too many people and they’re about to get hungry…let’s dig a little deeper here…who are ‘they’ and what are they hungry for?”

Some said people are hungry for actual food, others said they are hungry for connection, while still some said people hunger for communion at Church. As Jesus encouraged them to continue, more responses came: they thirst for the ability to do virtual school, they are hungry to work and have a home, they are starving for freedom and safety and they are craving to be accepted for their differing races, who they love, and their abilities without judgment, even the earth is crying out in hunger pangs.

“Jesus,” they exclaimed, “please do something!” To which Jesus responded, “Now I appreciate all your thoughts and prayers and, don’t get me wrong, you definitely need to keep sending those. But YOU are my disciples, YOU do something!”

They looked at each other perplexed, then Jesus inquired, “you’ve named all the things, and I’ve taught you the mission love and serve, so tell me what you have to offer. I’ll help you get started…what is your greatest desire for the world? For my greatest desire is that same desire that’s dwelling within you.” Finally, one person broke the silence to offer their extra laptop to a student, then another said they are a teacher, someone else offered their pantry and kitchen for people to help prepare food, while others offered their time and vehicles to distribute food and other goods. The energy picked up and the ideas were flowing like crazy. There were many who suggested ways to care for caregivers and support those who are suffering most from the virus. Several wanted to learn how to become visiting Eucharistic ministers and connect with each other in new ways. Some wanted to know how to be allies. They offered money, book studies, phone calls, and time and energy to join task forces and support efforts in a variety of ways. They continued brainstorming their resources and each decided they have something to offer and can hold each other accountable for feeding the “hungry.”

At this point, Jesus said, “See…You’ve got this! It’s going to take some work and it won’t be easy, but you already have everything you need to be my disciples. I am always with you in Spirit. Always remember your baptism and the promises you made on my behalf. As you go, I bless you and your offerings in My name to be My hands and feet in the world, now go in peace to love and serve. And for the love of Me, and all things Good, remember to wash your hands and wear a mask!”

— Susan Oakes

Susan Oakes is a rising senior at the Seminary of the Southwest in Austin, Texas. This summer, she is serving as a seminarian intern at Saint Stephen's, her sponsoring parish for ordination.  

Questions for Self Reflection

• What do you think people are hungry for?

• How do you fit in?

Daily Challenge

• Offer some prayer time for the needs of our community and then brainstorm some practical steps towards resolving, learning about, or supporting those needs in some way. Share with a friend.

Return to the Breath - June 3

Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 119:49-72; PM Psalm 49, [53]; Eccles. 3:1-15; Gal. 2:11-21; Matt. 14:1-12

I’m sitting on my deck. It’s a quiet, early morning, except for the birds singing their chorus and the sound of my own breath. The sun is beginning to peek through the trees, casting singular rays of light between the leaves and beginning to warm the day. I close my eyes for a moment to take in the warmth, the singing, and my breathing. As I open my eyes, I feel the sun rays more profoundly…those glorious rays are pointing directly at ME. I feel summoned by God in this moment. This gives me the urge to breathe in the morning air deeply into my lungs and feel its presence in my whole body. I’m immediately reminded of the phrase I learned in yoga, “return to the breath,” and I feel empowered.

That same breath that blew over the waters at Creation…Ruach (in Hebrew) ... is the same Spirit that empowered the disciples at Pentecost…and it’s the same breath of life that I’m breathing in this moment.         

*****

Lately, however, I have been haunted by the words, “I can’t breathe.” These are the words George Floyd cried out in his final moments of life. These words also hover over those who are suffering from Covid-19 and the people caring for them. Some of us are suffocating from the overwhelming responsibilities of managing caregiving, household, and work, or loss of work and trying to handle basic needs. We’re becoming more and more politically divisive. In many places, creation is gasping from the contamination and destruction of our earth. There is so much destruction and chaos happening right now. But if we are hopeful, it also feels like a shift towards creativity might be coming. I’m curious about what the Spirit might be up to.

The wisdom in Ecclesiastes tells us that there is a season for everything, and that God has ordered creation this way. While I strongly affirm that God does not cause the suffering we’re all experiencing, I do believe that God is present and uses all of life to somehow reconcile us. These words from the passage stand out to me, “it is God’s gift that all should eat and drink and take pleasure in all their toil.” I hear the emphasis in these words that God’s gift is for ALL people in cooperation with the whole of creation. Perhaps the wisdom in this passage is that this season of loss, grief, and suffering presents a time for us to remember that breath that created the world is still moving and we are sharing it. Maybe it is a time to return to the breath, focus on our breath, the same Spirit of God, and experience the presence of God, to pray and listen for creative ways we can work together to fulfill our Christian mission to love and serve the world.

— Susan Oakes

Susan Oakes is a rising senior at the Seminary of the Southwest in Austin, Texas. This summer, she is serving as a seminarian intern at Saint Stephen's, her sponsoring parish for ordination.  

Questions for Self Reflection

• How do you feel God’s presence?

• Where do you see hope? Curiosity?

Daily Challenge

• Return to the breath. Sit or stand tall with your feet firmly rooted in the ground. You may close your eyes if you wish. Take 3 deep breaths… in the name of the Creator, Redeemer, and Sustainer…filling your lungs and whole being with the breath of life…hold each breath for a few moments before pushing your breath out again. You may choose to do this several times during the day, giving thanks for the moments of gratitude, offering a prayer of lament or intercession, or simply as a cleansing breath to return to your center.

Church has left the building - June 2

Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 45; PM Psalm 47, 48; Eccles. 2:16-26; Gal. 1:18-2:10; Matt. 13:53-58

Church has left the building! Unbelievable, right?! Today we hear that Jesus is rejected in his hometown by their unbelief, so it seems like something unbelievable needs to be said here today. And I feel a sense of irony as your seminarian who has returned home to offer this reflection (that was intended to evoke a little chuckle). Of course, we know that Church is not the building, Church is the people, and Covid-19 has kicked us out of the church and into the world.

I have to admit…I’ve never felt called to digital ministry, in fact, I’m someone who has resisted it. There are so many reasons I’d rather keep doing things the old familiar way. Yet here we are. Suddenly, we’re doing church in ways we never dreamed would be possible. Churches are beginning to reach new people and people who would otherwise not be able to attend in person. This is a good thing that we might not have anticipated before. Besides online worship, we’re also thinking about new ways of being and doing church during these times of Covid 19 and I truly believe this is where it starts to get more interesting. It’s challenging, to say the least, but so far it’s working and it’s giving us something to think about!

The text from Matthew illustrates God’s power to work from insignificant and humble beginnings. The people of Nazareth found it hard to believe that God would raise a prophet from among them, from a carpenter’s son, this person they grew up with and thought they knew so well. But God was doing something crazy, unexpected and transformative in Jesus.

As the Body of Christ, maybe God is doing something strange and new in the Church since we’ve been kicked out. Maybe we don’t already know all there is to know about being the Church. We don’t know how long this pandemic will last, but it won’t last forever, and we WILL be able to gather again. And I can hardly wait for that time to come, but for now, Church has left the building and it’s being transformed. And we get to be a part of this new and crazy thing that’s happening! How can we harness this?

Maybe it’s a good thing that Church has left the building!

— Susan Oakes

Susan Oakes is a rising senior at the Seminary of the Southwest in Austin, Texas. This summer, she is serving as a seminarian intern at Saint Stephen's, her sponsoring parish for ordination.

 Questions for Self-Reflection

• What is something you’ve noticed that Church is doing well that has surprised you? 

• What new and different ways can you envision Church becoming?

Daily Challenge

• Try to conscientiously recognize moments when you see people being Church around you and recognize when you are being Church in the world, even pushing yourself to notice times that you could be Church in new ways that you haven’t done before.

You will be changed - June 1

Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 41, 52; PM Psalm 44; Eccles. 2:1-15; Gal. 1:1-17; Matt. 13:44-52

As I entered seminary, one of the first charges to our class was to be willing to be changed. We were encouraged to let go of whatever fears and doubts we might have, and even to let go of our hopes and dreams. By letting go of whatever images we hold of who we are, what it means to be a priest, what we already know, and even our own hopes and dreams, we’re more easily able to receive the transforming work of the Holy Spirit during seminary. The goal, they said, is to be changed. Through all the joys and pains, successes and failures, they said, you will be changed.

Friends, this message is for all Christians. God has big plans for our lives and the goal is to be changed. As Christians, we are changed by our baptism into the Risen Life of Christ. The Holy Spirit has been empowering the Church for 20 centuries, working across time and space, changing Christians as members of the Church.

I see this change reflected in the convictions of Paul’s message to the Galatians. He has already been proclaiming the grace of Christ crucified to them. But they are forgetting what Paul has taught them about the Cross of Christ and the Holy Spirit. Though Paul is astonished that they are abandoning God’s call to them, his zeal for Christ is contagious. He preaches and teaches with great energy and clarity, indeed with his whole life as a person changed by the power of the Holy Spirit.

I often hear people say they are looking forward to things getting back to normal, that they can hardly wait to have their lives back from this pandemic we’re all experiencing. I am eager for a new normal to become established, myself. But before we rush back to the way things were, perhaps we can use this time of pandemic to receive the Spirit of Christ in new and different ways by embracing the creative tension that is present. Paul was a devout Jew who was called by God to proclaim Christ to the Gentiles. Upon receiving this call, rather than going back to his comfort zone or conferring with others in Jerusalem, he went away to Arabia. It is unknown exactly what he was doing there, perhaps it was a place to pray and discern his next steps. Regardless, he took an intentional step back before emerging again with a new embodiment of Christ. Sometimes our next best move is to have an active posture of listening and allowing ourselves to be changed by the Spirit of Christ.

-- Susan Oakes, Seminarian

Susan Oakes is a rising senior at the Seminary of the Southwest in Austin, Texas. This summer, this summer, she is serving as a seminarian intern at Saint Stephen's, her sponsoring parish for ordination.

Questions for Self Reflection

• What doubts and fears, hopes and dreams can you let go of all of today?

• What is something you will not take for granted once you are able to do it again?

• What is something you hope will not return again?

• What creative tension do you feel lately?

• How can we as members of the Church be changed?

Daily Challenge

• While you are spending time at home today, take some time to sit in silence and simply listen. You might hear traffic, birds, children, pets or other sounds; you might be able to let those sounds float by your consciousness and hear only your breath or heartbeat or possibly the even the Spirit.

Go to Church or the Devil will Get You - May 30

Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 107:33-43, 108:1-6(7-13); Ezek. 36:22-27; Eph. 6:10-24; Matt. 9:18-26

On I-65 between Birmingham and Montgomery, there is this obnoxiously large sign, “Go to Church or the Devil will Get You.” There is a picture of a little man with elf-like shoes and a farming scythe.  I usually laugh when I drive by. Sometimes, I want to pull over and take a picture.  I have always thought the idea of a little man with horns that talks us into to doing bad things is pretty silly. 

Evil, on the other hand, seems as real as anything.  And it’s a whole lot bigger than a little elf man with horns.  I have been struggling with what to say in face of such evil in our world.  I probably don’t need to say too much as white men have dominated the conversation for too long, and instead need to do a better job of listening to my friends and other people of color.  I am heartbroken at the image of George Floyd’s life having been snatched from him for the crime of being born another color than me.  I am heartbroken from the story of Ahmaud Arbery.  Probably the most heinous of all was watching a video this week of a white woman threaten a black man who was bird watching in Central Park by calling the police and reporting that a black man was terrifying her and she was scared for her life.  The look in her eye and the sound of her voice as she changed cadences for the soul purpose of striking terror in the other’s life, left me with chills.  I also struggle with a theology that requires me to see all of these people, especially the ones terrifying others as beloved children of God and how to reconcile that.  And if all of these people are children of God, then how do I protect myself from the same evil that infects them, probably me, and much of our world.   

Listen to the author of Ephesians, “For our struggle is not against enemies of blood and flesh, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers of this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.” Cosmic powers of darkness.  Wow! The author then gives us an incredible image. “Therefore take up the whole armor of God, so that you may be able to withstand on that evil day, and having done everything, to stand firm. Stand therefore, and fasten the belt of truth around your waist, and put on the breastplate of righteousness. As shoes for your feet put on whatever will make you ready to proclaim the gospel of peace.”

Are you too struggling with how to respond? What if we saw our faith as the very armor that equips us and protects so that we can be agents of peace and reconciliation? What if our faith is the armor to speak love to fear and truth to power?   As Episcopalians, our faith asks us to repent of evil, and to acknowledge our role in it. That’s why there is grace, but we have to do this work and allow the Holy Spirit work and change us over time.  It might even be that this very work is the source of the armor of God. I don’t know that the devil will get you if you don’t go to church, but I do know that if you show up, the work you will be required to do is the work of reconciliation, of learning to pray for forgiveness for the wrongs we have done and the wrongs we have left undone, and to fight the forces of evil in this world.  Good thing we have some armor, a breastplate, and some new shoes for the journey.   Maybe we should see ourselves as superheroes.  Kind of scary, but also really cool.

-John+

 Questions for Self-Reflection

• How do you speak up against evil? How do you fight against it? If you struggle to, what keeps you from doing so? 

 Daily Challenge

• Spending some time reflecting on courage.  Share something with a friend or loved one that you wouldn’t have said before, that for you is working to undo the forces of evil in this world.

No Saints Allowed, Sinners Only - May 29

Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 102; PM Psalm 107:1-32; Jer. 31:27-34; Eph. 5:1-20; Matt. 9:9-17

I think I finally had a little come apart in the age of COVID-19. Yesterday, I was in the office and talking with our finance manager, Ann, and I just looked at her, and said, “I don’t know how to do all this.”  I was a little more honest and transparent than that.  The even-keeled Rector that Ann has gotten to know over the last year and a half had vanquished in plain sight and doubting Thomas was left in his place.  I feel like we are managing a start-up at Saint Stephen’s.  I guess most professions are evolving at lightning speed.  It is both exciting, and possibly the most challenging endeavor I have ever faced.   Ann calmly listened. “John, just read your reflections.”  When I laughed, she smiled, and then offered some real wisdom, “you don’t have to have it all figured out.”

I keep thinking we are going to hit perfection.  I want the best for our community.  I want our church to be the community that God calls us into, but my ego sometimes gets in the way.  I have dreams of our church being the shining example for the Christian faith for how we can reach out in love to all people, how we can model stewardship of creation in a way that inspires the world, how we can be the very best at preaching and teaching and modeling pastoral care for each other.  Which is why I found today’s Gospel reading so arresting. 

Jesus is hanging out with the fringe, often referred to as the tax collectors and prostitutes, and he is being criticized pretty heavily for it. To which he responds, “those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick.  Jesus wants no business with the people that have it all together.  And those people need to be around the sick, not for the sake of fixing them but probably because the well have no idea what God is really about.  I once saw a church sign in Nashville, “No saints allowed, sinners only.”  That’s the real beauty of church, not only do we not all have it together, we aren’t supposed to. 

It hit me in our reading for today, that not only should perfection be wiped from our goals, but maybe we will even lose something when we believe that we finally have it all together.  Maybe we lose the dependence on God and on each other, we lose the reality that we are sinners in need of grace. Be gentle with yourself. It’s ok.  No saints allowed to this party.

- John+

 Questions for Self-Reflection

• Are you comfortable with your imperfections?  

• In what ways do you rest with your own brokenness? 

 Daily Challenge

• Make a mental list of some of the things that you need to work on and then give thanks to God for making you the person that you are.  It doesn’t mean that we don’t need to change, only to remember there will always be things to work on.

Free your mind and the rest will follow - May 28

Today’s Scripture:  AM Psalm 105:1-22; PM Psalm 105:23-45Zech. 4:1-14; Eph. 4:17-32; Matt. 9:1-8

 The lyrics of a hit song from when I was in sixth grade come to mind when as I read today’s lesson from Ephesians: “Free your mind and the rest will follow.” En Vogue wrote a song about judgment and prejudice and our ability to essentially place people in boxes based on our knowledge, knowledge that is limited and based on stereotypes.  Freeing your mind was about finding freedom because you could be alleviated of what you learned over time which kept you from finding the fullness of life. 

In this letter to the Ephesians, the author says, “you must no longer live as the Gentiles live, in the futility of their minds.  They are darkened in their understanding, alienated from the life of God because of their ignorance and hardness of heart.”  The author is claiming that the mind is useless for the Gentiles because of their hardness of heart. This is a pretty odd thing to lift up in our tradition, a tradition that values education, philosophical reasoning, and the pursuit of knowledge. 

I am beginning to wonder if one of the concerns of spending less time with people in this physically distanced reality, is the risk of spending too much time in our own heads.  We either spend too much time reading articles on Facebook or making snap judgments about the people we see on the cover of articles or walking around the grocery store.  As it pertains to judgments, some of those might be warranted, but what the author of Ephesians could be suggesting is the limitations of our mind if our heart is hardened. 

Consider this – everything we have been discussing as a society struggling to figure out how to live in a pandemic is based on knowledge.  ‘How do particles spread?  Rates of infection?  How to clean?  How to gather? Who is contagious? What is contagious?  Why do some people get affected and not others?’  If we are waiting to discover some complete amount of knowledge for how to live and be and thrive, we will spend the rest of our lives living in the walls of our minds. 

 Instead, how do our lives change when we focus on what comes from the heart?  ‘How can I care for that person who is stressed out?  How can I reach out in love to my neighbor who is scared or lost her job?  How can I listen to my friend who is sick and hurting? I wonder if these are more important questions to frame our lives.  At the root of these questions are not some sort of knowledge or wisdom, but a loosening of the heart to have compassion be the driving ethic of how we live.  It’s probably not wise to throw out all of our knowledge but considering how our hearts might guide our lives more deeply seems like a worthwhile expression.  Maybe it’s to free our mind, and the rest will follow. 

- John+

 Questions for Self-Reflection

• What knowledge do you work to obtain?  How do you strengthen your mind?  How do you strengthen your heart?  Are those done differently?

Daily Challenge

• Pick a day to fast from reading the news or doing research on a topic related to current events.  Use that time to pray or reach out to a neighbor or friend in need.

Fashioning a Canopy - May 27

Today’s Readings:  AM Psalm 101, 109:1-4 (5-19) 20-30; PM Psalm 119:121-144Isa. 4:2-6; Eph. 4:1-16; Matt. 8:28-34

 We have reached the point in the year where there is no escaping the fury of the Alabama heat.  With the most pleasant spring of recent memory, this weekend brought change with vengeance.  While the temperature didn’t break 90 degrees, it didn’t matter.  Coupled with the sweltering humidity, if you left the comfort of air conditioning this weekend, images from this upcoming Sunday when we hear the story of tongues of fire touching the people gathered might have come to mind.  It was hot!

 And maybe I feel that way because I went for a bike ride at the hottest point of the day on Sunday, and the sun beating down on the black pavement of the road through Oak Mountain State Park just amplified the sun.  But here is the thing - there was a moment where the ride took us into a beautiful canopy, and everything changed.  It was as if it got twenty degrees cooler instantaneously. 

I am interested in this image of a canopy in this morning’s reading from Isaiah.  “The canopy will serve as a pavilion, a shade by day from the heat, and a refuge and a shelter from the storm.”  It is a prophetic text giving an image of what the Kingdom of God or the reign of God will look like, but the metaphor means the heat is still there, we only get more comfortable resting in it. 

I think about the pain and suffering in the world a lot.  Maybe it is the vocation of walking with people at all moments of life, but I think we are all there.  We see it in our newsfeeds, in the phone calls with loved ones and friends.  We pray it when we open the prayer list in the weekly email or hear it on Sunday.  If we aren’t careful to sit with others or our own pain, we might be tempted to fix it in a way to that minimizes that pain.  Words roll off our tongue like, “God won’t give you more than you can handle” or “it’s really not that big of a deal.”  What this often conveys is our own discomfort with what others are experiencing.   

But I wonder if this image from Isaiah is a more helpful image for us to adopt.  Instead of fixing other people’s problems, what if we were to provide a canopy, a safe respite where its 20 degrees cooler, where people can sustain their own pain in a way that allows them to also experience the grace of God, find respite, if not refreshment.  Not only are we beginning a true Alabama summer, but in the midst of a pandemic, we seem as fragile as ever.  Maybe what we need most is not to be fixed of our problems, but some respite from this heat.  How could you and I fashion a canopy for each other?

— John+

 Questions for Self-Reflection

• What problems of others do you try to fix?  When you want to help someone, what does that look like?

 Daily Challenge

• Think of a specific problem that you have worked to alleviate for another person, especially if that person or relationship has crossed cultural boundaries.  Think of one way you could have responded differently now. Try that approach next time a situation arises.

Being Rooted in Love - May 26

Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 97, 99, [100]; PM Psalm 94, [95]1 Sam. 16:1-13a; Eph. 3:14-21; Matt. 8:18-27

One of my favorite elementary school science experiments was when the teacher would take food coloring and place in the water of a white pedaled flower.  Almost overnight, the carnation or rose would begin to take the color of the food coloring mixed with water.  Pink water, pink carnation.  Green water, green rose.  Voilà! 

Which leads me to this beautiful passage in Ephesians where the author prays for the Christian community, “that Christ may dwell in your hearts, as you are being rooted and grounded with love.”  To sum up the Christian faith, at least as I understand it, ‘you (and all of humankind) are unconditionally loved by God.’ I know a lot of traditions like to focus on other things, maybe what you are supposed to believe, or how you are supposed to pray, or what you are supposed to wear or not wear, eat or not eat.  Some traditions are even concerned with who we love.  But consider this – if the premise of our faith is God’s love, then our Christian faith should be about modeling that love for the world and each other in return.   

And while a lot of traditions worry about rules, and who is in and who is out, think about the image offered in Ephesians – you are rooted and grounded with love.  Maybe living our faith out in this world is as easy as remembering that we are loved, dwelling in that love, and letting it change the way God’s beauty is reflected in this world.  When we will fill our vases with God’s love, we begin to reflect that love in a way that can be recognized by others. To live as God calls us, we have to be rooted in love.

Today, instead of worrying about who you are, and who you are not, what you have done or what you have left undone, spend some time resting in the reality that you are unconditionally loved as a child of God.  And if you are worried about becoming a better person, or a more faithful person, then this scripture would point us to focusing on being grounded and rooted in love as a faithful place to begin.

— John+ 

Questions for Self-Reflection

• Do you believe that you are loved unconditionally by God?  Are there things that you wish were different or you could change? Are those barriers to accepting God’s love?

Daily Challenge

• Think of a person or people that frustrate you.  Remind yourself that they are a beloved child of God, just as you are.  Does this change your feelings or approach to that person or those people?

Moses' Longterm Plan - May 25

Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 89:1-18; PM Psalm 89:19-52Joshua 1:1-9; Eph. 3:1-13; Matt. 8:5-17

I have always felt sorry for Moses.  He spends his whole life being the go-between for God and God’s people.  He is not known for his communication skills.  After spending his early life in Egypt, he leads his people to freedom only to end up wandering in the desert for forty years.  And just before his people arrive in the promise land, he dies. He will not see what he has been promised and what he worked so hard to ensure that his people will inherit. 

I remember saving for an entire year the $475 which was half of the cost for me to attend the National Scout Jamboree in Fort AP Hill, Virginia in 1993.  It felt like an eternity.  I can’t imagine saving for 40 years.  There are so many stories of people slogging away and saving, to purchase a home, attend college, or retire debt, but always with an end in sight, and outcomes that the person will one day experience something of the magnitude of their own promise land.  This is why the story in today’s reading from Joshua is so amazing:  Moses never experiences what he has fought so hard for his people. I am sure he wanted to be in the promise land just as much as anyone else, and yet one of the most revered leaders in all of Scripture dies just before experiencing God’s big promise and that joy is passed to Joshua.  He pays off the mortgage and yet never gets to walk through the front door.

Which leads me to the question our Old Testament challenges me with: is Moses such a faithful leader because he plays the long game and sacrifices his own fulfillment for the life of his people?  It is interesting to me that what seems to be one of the pervasive threads within our societal conversations is ‘what is freedom,’ and ‘aren’t we protected to be able to do what we want to do while exercising that freedom?’  How can a government require that a church offer (or not offer) in-person worship, or require a person to wear a mask, or ask businesses to reduce the number of patrons?  That seems to limit our personal and protected freedoms?  People seem to be pushing back with great force. 

And I am not a legal expert and cannot speak to what is right and fair in the eyes of our legal system or constitution.  But as a person of faith, I do believe we look for the virtues that are embodied within Scripture, especially when held up as examples of being faithful, and learn to let those virtues inform our own praxis of Christian living.  And today we read about Moses and Joshua.  Could Moses, even in his death and loss of seeing what his people finally came to see, be a window into how we might sacrifice our own needs, rights, and privileges, especially if it was for the wellbeing of our people?  At the very least, could we learn to say, ‘this isn’t about me, but what is best for my fellow humankind.’

—John+

 Daily Questions

•  What are some of the things that you are working to accomplish?  Do you have a 5, 10, 40-year long term plan?  How will your plans benefit other people? 

Daily Challenge

• Pick one thing to give up this week which will directly impact other people and make other lives better?  It could be a physical thing or a thought or idea that is shaping you.

1 Peter: Re-imagined for 2020 - May 24

The words of 1 Peter 4:12-14, 5:6-11, appointed as the Epistle reading for Sunday, May 24, are a gift of inspiration and assurance for us - especially for this time of pandemic. The letter was written to Christian churches in modern-day Turkey during the first century. As an experiment in sharing the Good News, I re-imagined this letter through the lens of the 21st century and the circumstances that envelop our world today. Perhaps this excerpt from 1 Peter in 2020 would read something like this:

My friends for whom I love as only God loves,

Around us strange things are happening. They feel like tests and temptations, don’t they? Try doing this – as you can, take comfort, and even joy, knowing that the sacrifices you are experiencing are a way of sharing space with Jesus Christ. When you see glimpses of Jesus revealed now, know that his glory is unchanging – rejoice in those “God-winks”!

When people challenge you in a myriad of ways – questions of wearing a mask (or not) in the public space; resuming worship in-person or continuing online; choice to go ahead for a summer jaunt to the beaches of Miami or Fort Lauderdale, etc. — take a moment -- make space for a deep breath through your whole being. The Holy Spirit is resting upon you and bringing you refreshment. It is not upon your shoulders to respond.

In all the difficulties that surround you, get some perspective. Remember how strong and mighty God is. Begin with that humble posture, and God will lift you up at the right time…in God’s time. It’s hard to wait, unsure what tomorrow looks like. I know. Put your distractions and anxieties on God – entrust those concerns to the Lord, for you are one of the sheep in God’s flock, remember? You, too, are cared for, precious one.

Keep your head clear, be vigilant. Hard times are still ahead, and temptations are at large, swirling around you. Evil looks to devour that which is good, so when you feel swayed or crumbling, resist – stand firm. You are not alone. You have the solidarity of every other child of God around the world in this time of hardship and pain. So, lean upon your belief in God, which is solid.

And as you hold on…as you endure, God’s grace will surround you. God’s grace will bring healing. God’s grace will support you. God’s grace will make you strong. And God’s grace will settle your anxious heart. For, though this time is hard, God continues to have this promise to which you are invited: eternal glory in Christ. Our God reigns over all days – good, bad and ugly. Truly.

With love, and God’s peace,

Your family in suffering and sacrifice.

—+—

As our forebears, the early Christians, endured struggles two thousand years ago, we, too, can and will persist in our faith in the midst of our hardships and fear today. Friends, may our hearts remain tender in the strange days ahead…even when we are scared, hurt, or in disagreement. Let us look to the assurance and care that we hear in the gospel and in the letter from 1st Peter. We continue to remain open in God’s love as the one Body of Christ.

Alleluia!
— Katherine+

God’s steadfast love endures forever - May 23

Today’s Readings:  Psalm 136; Num. 11:16-17,24-29; Eph. 2:11-22; Matt. 7:28-8:4

I saw this meme recently: “I told my suitcases that there will be no vacation this year. Now I am dealing with emotional baggage.”

Emotional baggage. Why do we carry around hurts that drag us down and plague our dreams? Are we setting ourselves up for being breathless from lugging our burdens from place to place? I wonder…is a reason we persistently tote emotional baggage because our lives are entwined in the stories around them? The tales of our lived experiences, whether joy-filled or painful, define the points along the line of our existence. Ignoring an event which causes us heartache does not make it go away.

However, we can work toward reconciliation, figuring out how to incorporate our wounds in a way that fits with our plans for continued living. This is a daily process done with God’s help, and sometimes with the guidance of professionals. What are we to do when the previously reconciled baggage keeps tripping us up – especially in a pandemic? Even when we have good structures in place for coping with what (and who) ails us, we get tired and overloaded. Parts of our history overwhelm us, like waves welling up and crashing down. Pain flares up again. Our defenses are down. We lash out. We lapse. We lose the solid footing beneath us.

How can we shore up our foundation, when so much around us feels tenuous? I cannot answer for every aspect for life; I can raise one avenue to ponder. Psalm 136 has a message repeated in every verse: God’s steadfast love endures forever. In spite of every aspect of the painful history of the Israelites, God’s steadfast love endures forever. The same is for your story and mine: God’s steadfast love and mercy endure. No matter what. Let that repetition create a sense of spiritual grounding and calm in your life today.

-- Katherine+

Questions for Reflection

• What emotional baggage is bothering you most today?

• What image or word helps you reconnect to yourself, God, and others?

Daily Challenge

Practice a mode of centering that brings you grounding: meditative breathing or prayer, going for a walk, playing music, reflecting on scripture or written note with a message like, “I love you!”. Then, inwardly digest that you are worthy, and God’s steadfast love for you endures forever.

Hannah prayed and said, ‘My heart exults in the Lord' - May 22

Today’s Readings:  AM Psalm 85, 86; PM Psalm 91, 92, 1 Sam. 2:1-10; Eph. 2:1-10; Matt. 7:22-27

There are many sacrifices people in our midst are making during this time. Perhaps you know of people sequestered from their family and friends, because their job calls them to be repeatedly exposed to COVID-19. Some are working long hours, putting a strain on bodies, minds, and relationships. Due to caregiver responsibilities for children or aging parents, others have had to quit working, or shift to working late at night after others have gone to bed. There are the threshold moments that are lost – in-person celebrations of new births, graduation ceremonies, and meaningful days like anniversaries and birthdays. Those living alone are hungering for personal interactions and yet choose to remain physically separate, but they are slipping into confusion or disorientation. I bet you can think of others, too.

In the biblical context, sacrifice often means that an animal was slaughtered and burned on the altar as an offering to God – a first-fruits gift, or an act of repentance, or upon making a prayer to God. As I reflect on what sacrifice looks like today, we offer our bodies in different ways – and unless we are firefighters or other first responders, we are not putting ourselves into a physical fire. However, I can see where we do subject ourselves to metaphorical fires, as we enter difficult situations, surrendering part of ourselves for the sake of someone else. Why do we make these sacrifices day after day, and how are we being molded through this time?

In the reading from 1 Samuel today, we read the ancient “Song of Hannah”. She has made a great sacrifice, by giving her young son, Samuel, to the temple priest Eli. You see, for many years Hannah was unable to have children. She vowed to God that if he would help her conceive, she would offer the boy child into the service of the Lord. Hannah kept her word and upon leaving him at the temple with Eli, she offered the poem we know as the Song of Hannah. I can imagine tears of joy and sadness flowing down her cheeks as she praised God for God’s holiness, faithfulness, power, and knowledge. Her dedication to God was so great that she was willing to lend her child to the work of the Lord.

Please don’t misunderstand me – I am not asking you to drop off your kids as the stoop of Saint Stephen’s. Or at my house. Please – two children are enough in our home! And while some moments I want to get significant distance from my kids, I cannot imagine doing what Hannah did. Yet, what I do hear stirring in this Song of Hannah is a call to rejoice to God, even in the midst of a difficult situation. While our feet are on ground that is painful and brings us anxiety, before reacting further, let us center ourselves first by looking up to God. Hannah can teach us this rhythm.

Friends, my prayers are with you as you make sacrifices for your family and those around you. This is not an easy time. If life feels like it is getting too hard and the costs are mounting, reach out. Call the church. Call a friend. You are not alone. Hannah wasn't, and neither are you.

-- Katherine+

Questions for Reflection

• What have you had to give up during COVID-19?

• For whom do you make sacrifices?

Daily Challenge

Reread the Song of Hannah (1 Samuel 2:1-10). Note what word stands out to you. Take a walk and reflect on how you are called to serve the Lord today.

There was more than one doubting disciple! - May 21

Today’s Readings:  AM Psalms 8, 47; PM Psalms 24, 96; Dan. 7:9-14; Heb. 2:5-18; Matt. 28:16-20

Today is the Feast of the Ascension, when we remember the day Jesus was lifted up into the air until his disciples could no longer see him. In the final verses of Matthew, we read the resurrected Jesus’ last-minute reminders to his friends and students. He issues the Great Commission, charging them to disciple all people; baptize in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit; and, teach everyone of the Torah and God’s love. Jesus gives these directions to all 11 disciples.

What strikes me today is a detail of group dynamics – the disciples are not of one mind! The narrator shares that they gathered at the mountain, bowed as servants to Jesus, and some doubted. After experiencing so much – from Jesus’ ministry and miracles, to time spent with the resurrected Jesus in multiple settings – some are still wavering. Note that the word “some” is plural; more than one disciple has doubt. What is it that they question? His divinity as the Son of God? Whether he truly is risen from the dead? Something else?

I think of Jesus as a pretty intuitive guy. Does he sense the uncertainty? And if so, does that cause him concern? We read in Hebrews that Jesus becomes “like his brothers [and sisters] in every respect so that he might be a merciful and faithful high priest”. By joining in the beauty and adventure of our full humanity, Jesus shares the feelings, thoughts, and experiences of his friends and followers. Because of his divinity, he loves them as God his Father loves. As such, Jesus is full of mercy, faith, and empathy. Perhaps he could even be called an empath, keenly able to understand and share the feelings of others. Grounded in God’s love, Jesus sees that all 11 disciples are equipped to raise up others to be baptized into life with him, in spite of any doubt or wavering. He knows they can rise to the occasion.

As we live into the call of being disciples of Christ each and every day, let us do so with empathy and love. Doubt does not nullify faith in God, and differences do not disqualify us from participating in the Great Commission. With God’s help, we can rise to the occasion, too.

-- Katherine+

Questions for Reflection

• What are your questions and doubts about Jesus?

• What obstacles prevent you from showing mercy or having empathy?

Daily Challenge

Think about a time when, in a group, you have held a different perspective than others. How did others in the group respond when learning of your position? Journal about how you grew from that experience. For any feelings of pain or regret, pray for God’s healing and reconciliation.

Testing...testing...is this thing on? - May 20

Today’s Readings:  AM Psalm 119:97-120; PM Psalms 81, 82, Lev. 26:27-42; Eph. 1:1-10; Matt. 22:41-46

Saint Stephen’s is trying new technologies while we are physically dispersed. We’ve adopted the mindset that we are making small experiments. Some work. Some don’t. We learn through testing them! The application ZOOM crashed on Sunday morning around the world, affecting the video-streamed Children’s Chapel lesson Jennifer Jones and others had planned. This week John and I have been broadcasting with some different tools. There has been a mix of success and frustration. I spent a couple of minutes Tuesday afternoon broadcasting footage of me with a quizzical expression, a few giggles, and mutterings of “I don’t know…Is it working?” It was a test, and it sort of worked. Tests point to our limits: where we are succeeding and where our opportunities for improvement remain.

We find Jesus with the Pharisees today in the reading from Matthew. Both the Sadducees and Pharisees have been testing Jesus. They have been trying to trip up and trick him, so that they can humiliate and discredit him. What happens next is a bit of “just desserts”. Those testing through intellect have the tables turned upon them; Jesus volleys a question back their way and they are stumped, for “no one was able to give him an answer, nor from that day did anyone dare to ask him any more questions.”

Ultimately, Jesus holds up the truth that, while questions and curiosity are welcome, the Pharisees cannot trick or out-reason God. This is a hard truth we get to mull over, too… especially when our faith in God is tested. We may try to trick ourselves or others, or we may rationalize our choices, but our God is the God of truth. God calls us to honest inquiry and understanding – rather than a series of “gotchas!”

Maybe living out our Christian faith becomes a series of small experiments, too. We get to test with curiosity where we find our own grounding in God’s blessing and grace. We get to reflect upon the irony that when we are testing a software, colleague, or social limit, we are tested in that exchange, too. So, stay curious and make small experiments – not to be right, but to learn more, about God, those around you, and yourself.

-- Katherine+

Questions for Reflection

• What questions do you have for Jesus?

• Who is someone who tests you? Who do you test?

Daily Challenge

Think of an experiment or something new you’ve done lately. What worked? What didn’t? Write down what you learned about yourself. Take a moment to give thanks to God for your growth and awareness.

Needing God’s grace - May 19

Today’s Readings:  AM Psalm 78:1-39; PM Psalm 78:40-72, Lev. 26:1-20; 1 Tim. 2:1-6; Matt. 13:18-23

During the Easter season, we celebrate the resurrection and ascension of Jesus and the renewal of our baptismal promise. The fabrics and flowers are white, and we say lots of alleluias. We (generally) omit the Confession of Sin. And yet, we still face situations that bring us regret. We still have the propensity to sin - lying, lashing out, and losing tempers. Or, is my household the only one in this situation?

I got really angry the other day; I lost my cool at one of my kids. Today’s psalm felt like antiseptic dribbling on a wound as I read the words, “many times he [God] held back his anger and did not permit his wrath to be roused. For he remembered that they were but flesh.” It stirred in me the need to confess: I do not always hold back my anger. I forget that my loved ones are human, and I expect them to be perfect. If I continue being honest, I hold myself to a similar standard of flawlessness, and yet, God somehow does not strike me down with lightning or plague when I fall short in my humanity.

How does that theology jive with Leviticus? Follow God’s law and you will flourish: “the trees of the field shall yield their fruit.” Break a statute and your fate is bleak: “I will bring terror on you; consumption and fever that waste the eyes and cause life to pine away.” Harsh, huh?

But that’s not the end. The gift of Jesus’ ministry and God’s redemption of the world through the Risen Son reveals that we can honor the structure set forth in the law and the healing grace of our God. We are called to live into the foundational statutes that order our hearts and lives: love God and love one another. Rather than the terminus of continual punishment seven times over for our sins, we are invited again and again to repent and be reconciled - turning away from those actions that separate us from God and living into the love that unites us as the Body of Christ.

Perhaps this prayer to confess your need for God’s healing grace can bring you peace and restoration in a time of trial and weakness:

Compassionate God, we confess our weaknesses and our need for your strengthening touch.

We confess that some illnesses stem from our own fault, while others are beyond our control.

We turn to you, source of life, and ask in the name of our Savior Jesus Christ for the gifts of true healing and life in you. Amen.

-- Katherine+

Questions for Reflection

• How does the message of Leviticus match or conflict with how you see God?

• What help do you need to feel from God today?

Daily Challenge

Sit with and pray the Confession of Need.

A sensory experience in sowing seeds - May 18

Today’s Readings:  AM Psalm 80; PM Psalm 77, [79]; Lev. 25:35-55; Col. 1:9-14; Matt. 13:1-16

My family and I recently watched a movie called “Stargirl”. The titular character Stargirl Caraway plays a ukulele and brings a breath of inspiration to a high school in the Arizona desert. During a crescendo, she speaks of the gift that comes from slowing down, rather than living in distraction and fury. She offers the image of an unfurling flower, for seldom someone sits and watches the progression from seed on the ground into a colorful burst in the garden. What would it be like if we were to reflect upon and appreciate the intricate steps that brought the beautiful plant to the point that we behold it? Extrapolated to the people around us, what would such an act of care and attentiveness look like? How would this affect relationships?

In telling the parable of the sower of seeds upon various terrains, Jesus calls his listeners to take note – to pay attention – to consider. While he sits in that boat, I have this image of Jesus holding some sheaths of grain. As he talks, he examines the top where grain kernels are nestled. How would reflecting on those pellets, waiting to be loosed and milled, draw the crowd’s attention to the wonder of that plant’s growth? Hearing of the types of ground, perhaps the people examine the sand beneath their shoes and look to see what surrounds them. How might people hear and see differently? How might they be stirred or restored through such a reflection? Would they marvel at the gift resting at Jesus’ fingertips? Would they accept the gift of God’s love and salvation in Jesus? Can you?

There are times, perhaps like today, when our hearts are dull, our eyes are shut, or our heads are swimming in a myriad of stressors. We just cannot bear to see another hardship. And, while the terrain around us is varied and perilous, we can choose to take a moment to still ourselves and reflect on God’s word through Holy Scripture. Accept Jesus’ invitation to consider God’s message of salvation and flourishing…those seeds will take root and grow, one step at a time.

-- Katherine+

Questions for Reflection

• What parts of your soul’s soil need enrichment today?

• Who or what shakes you up to pay attention and listen in a deeper way?

Daily Challenge

Invite a friend or loved one to share a story that has shaped them into who they are today, including what was hard and what helped them grow more.

Our ordinary life is a playground for our faith - May 16

Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 75, 76; PM Psalm 23, 27; Lev. 23:23–44; 2 Thess. 3:1–18; Matt. 7:13–21

When I lived in West Tennessee, one of the state representatives quoted a portion of today’s readings from the 2nd Letter to the Thessalonians in justifying his vote to remove funding for the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP) better known as food stamps. He quoted what we have read for today: “If you don’t work, you shouldn’t eat.” But context matters. And in this letter, the community of believers is idle because they believed that the Kingdom of God was so near, that tomorrow would look very different than today. Essentially, these people had given up on the day to day way of being because of their belief in the imminent return of Jesus. They didn’t think everything else mattered.

This point of view is intriguing to explore because it reflects a spirituality where God is outside of everyday living. God is far off, and something special will happen one day for us, if we do the right thing or believe that right thing. But the author of the Epistle offers an alternative view: it is in the ordinary, day to day, the laboring and working, that we find meaning and purpose. It is in the ordinary that we find our faith and confidence in God.

If you are reading this, you are doing something this very moment to nurture your own spirituality and faith, so maybe I am writing to the wrong crowd. But I worry that some might adopt a posture, that working on one’s faith will just need to wait until we can gather again in a church building. Now, I am also taking the letter out of context in applying it to our spiritual lives, but the author’s point is still made. We find confidence in the Lord in the ordinariness of our lives. Maybe you are finding more idle time than you would like. Or maybe you are stressed out more than usual. But if God is a part of everything we experience, then there is never a better time than now to explore how we are growing in our life with Christ. May we all learn to see are ordinary life as a playground for living out our faith.

- John+

Questions for Self-Reflection

• How do you see the stories of Scripture reflected in your day to day life? Are their characters from the Bible or events that speak especially to you? Has that changed in the last few months?

Daily Challenge

• Use a daily task to help you grow in your faith. Pick an ordinary chore, like vacuuming or unloading the dishwasher, and use that time to specifically pray for people on your heart and mind.

There is a log in their eye and it wasn't caused by Covid-19 - May 15

Today’s Readings: AM Psalm 106:1–18; PM Psalm 106:19–48; Lev. 23:1–22; 2 Thess. 2:1–17; Matt. 7:1–12

In Wednesday’s reflection, we explored the imagery of eyesight and how when we reframe our vision to see goodness and possibility, we allow our lives to be filled with light. Common sense would lead us to believe that for this to be possible, we would need healthy eyes, or eyes free from obstruction. But as Jesus continues in the Sermon on the Mount in today’s Gospel reading, he draws attention once again to our eyes. Jesus says, “Why do you see the speck in your neighbor’s eye, but do not notice the log in your own eye? Or how can you say to your neighbor, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ while the log is in your own eye?” He is talking to his followers and there is an assumption that their view is obstructed. There is a log in their eye, and it wasn’t caused by Covid-19.

It’s been pretty easy to make some judgments lately. She’s not wearing a mask, or he is running with a group of people, or she posted this crazy story on Facebook, or they are acting so stupid! Or that church over there is opening up. Or our church isn’t! It’s easy to think we know what is best for other people. So, I hear a careful indictment from Jesus to watch our judgment. And maybe an even more helpful reminder that we are all far from perfect as well.

I think it’s helpful to imagine, that to see well, doesn’t mean that we have perfect vision, it only requires a little bit of humility to know that we have obstructions too. Maybe they are blinders that keep us from valuing another position, or at least suspending judgment enough to learn from someone else. Maybe your position is the better one, but a posture of curiosity will go far. And it’s helpful to be reminded, we all have things we need to work on too.

Questions for Self-Reflection

• What are people doing right now that is driving you crazy?

• What are you doing right now that might be upsetting to others?

Daily Challenge 

• Practice suspending judgment and self-reflection. Pay attention today, and when someone does something or says something that upsets you, think of one thing you have done recently that is upsetting to others.