And They Deserted Him - July 21
Today’s Readings - Psalm 45; Joshua 8:1-22; Rom. 14:1-12; Matt. 26:47-56
“Then all the disciples deserted him and fled.” There aren’t too many words in the New Testament that bother me more than this last verse from today’s gospel reading from Matthew. I’ve read them more times than I can remember and each time I read these lines and the narrative leading up to them I have mixed reactions. How could they have done that to their best friend, their teacher their companion, their lord? And then I consider what was at stake, how frightened they must have been, how confused and then how easy it would have been to panic and without considering their actions, run. I know because I’ve been there and done that.
We’ve all from time to time been faced with choosing between protecting ourselves, our reputation, our livelihood, and our loyalty for someone else, something else. Sometimes regretfully we’ve chosen the more selfish, safer option. Unfortunately, it can sometimes feel as though that’s the only option we have. And worse of all it can be way too easy to justify actions that we are less than proud of having committed.
Thankfully, this hasn’t happened to me very often. There are times when I’ve chosen to be safe, trying not to get involved, or not speaking our when I knew I should, but my heart has never let me off easy. Several years ago, I decided to honestly respond to a situation when I could have chosen to avoid it. I could have looked the other way and allowed it to continue. It would have been so much easier. Instead, I spoke up and I lost a friendship that I’ve missed but that was toxic and best cut loose. I know she’ll never understand that I was doing what I honestly knew was right, but I eventually came to peace with it knowing I did the right thing.
Jesus is more aware than we will ever be of how many ways we are challenged each day. We will never know how many times we’ve deserted him, the times we haven’t spoken up for those who have no voice, the times we haven’t taken just a few minutes to check on someone or to tell someone they matter. It’s a generous grace-filled love on Christ’s part that prevents us from knowing, because the weight of it all would probably be more than we could bear.
The last line in this narrative will always haunt me, but it’s the reminder I know I need on a daily basis; to try harder, to be more intentional, to be more aware, more present to the needs that we are surrounded by each and every day. It’s also the reminder I need to remember the sacrifice Jesus made for us so that we might know the freeing grace of forgiveness. The disciples like us out of fear and confusion ran for their lives, but at what cost? What is life without our relationship with Christ?
Faithfully,
Sally+
Questions for Reflection and Challenge - When you run from seeing the face of Jesus, when you turn to look the other way, who do you see? Do you see the reflection of someone you respect? Or, do you see the face of someone you wish had made better choices? What can we do to be more intentional, to remain more loyal to Jesus?